Farm jokes
What do you call a cow that doesn't produce any milk? An udder failure.
Two cows are standing in a field.
Cow 1: Did you hear about the outbreak of mad cow disease?
Cow 2: Good thing I'm a helicopter.
You take care of chickens. Does that make you a chicken tender?
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To get to the idiot's door.
Knock, knock!
It's the chicken.
What do you call terrible milk?
Udder Bullshit.
A scarecrow got promoted because he was outstanding in his field.
What’s 12 inches and is moist inside?
My record holding cucumbers, locally grown at my farm.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Interrupting cow.
Interrupting cow wh---
MOOOO!
Did you hear about the boy who sat under a cow?
He got a pat on the head.
My cow just wandered into a field of marijuana. The steaks have never been so high...
What do you call someone who takes care of chickens?
A chicken tender.
A rooster ran across the border from the USA to Canada and laid an egg. Which country does that egg belong to?
Roosters don't lay eggs.
What do you call a sleeping bull? A bulldozer!
What do you call a masturbating cow?
Beef stroganoff.
What do you call a cow jumping over barbed wire? Utter destruction.
"Meow, meow, I'm a cow," I said.
"Meow, meow, I'm a cow."
A kid milks a cow and goes to school and tells his friends, "I milked a cow, and it took awhile for it to warm up." His brother came over and said, "We don't have cows, we have bulls."
Where can you find the freshest vegetables? A school for the disabled!
What is a cow's favorite party game?
Moo-sical chairs!
What do you call a sleeping cow?
A bull-dozer.