Family jokes
Can orphans eat at a family restaurant?
Why can’t an orphan be gay?
They don’t have a closet to hide in.
I hate this. Everybody knows it's how I roll, if you jump into my van you get a Tootsie Roll. My uncle said this...
Q: What's an orphan's favorite part of a website?
A: The homepage.
Why can't orphans have sex?
Because they have no one to call "daddy."
Yo mama is so ugly she's really the reason phone screens cracked!
Why are orphans so good at GTA?
Because they're not wanted.
Yo mama so fat, Dora can't explore her.
Little Johnny runs up to his mother and says, "Mommy, mommy, the other day I was playing with my ball upstairs and my ball got away and into your closet, and when I went to get it, daddy came in with the lady next door and they started hugging and kissing and the lady next door took off daddy's clothes and daddy took off the clothes from the lady next door, and they both got into your bed, and the lady next door got on top of daddy and started...". The mother cuts him off and says "Just stop right there. You wait until your daddy comes home so you can tell him everything you just told me." Couple hours later the father arrives and walks through the door to find his wife and child with bags packed. She walks up to him and slaps across the face shouting "I'm leaving you... Go ahead Johnny, tell him what you told me earlier." Johnny steps forward to tell his daddy. "Daddy, the other day I was playing with my ball upstairs and my ball got away and into your closet, and when I went to get it, you came in with the lady next door and you both started hugging and kissing and the lady next door took off your clothes and you took off the clothes from the lady next door, and you both got into your bed, and the lady next door got on top of you and started doing the same thing mom did with uncle Joe last summer."
I have so many orphan jokes. I'm afraid most of them won't hit home.
What's an orphan's least favorite joke?
Dad jokes.
I was reading the news and read that a kid killed his family, and when they interviewed him, he said he wanted to become Batman.
Ur mum—oh wait, you don't have that.
What's an orphan's favorite game?
"Who's your daddy?"
(Go look up the game)
Do you ever look at a person and think, "Just how many generations of inbreeding did it take to create you?"
I like my kids like I like my lamps. Hung from the ceiling.
A Chinese couple had a black baby and named him Sum Ting Wong.
Roses are red. Violets are blue. Sugar is sweet. And your mom is, too.
Why did my mother buy me a Honda? She knows I can't move, so she pushed my wheelchair with me in it into the ocean. I survived just by a second, but a shark got my wheelchair, fucking bitch.
Why did the orphan become a str1pper?
So she can have someone to call daddy.