Family jokes
Why did the son go to the store?
To find his dad.
I traded my sister for a slice of pizza. Damn, that pizza was good!
If you are ever mad, punch an orphan.
What are they going to do? Tell their parents?
Why was the orphan so successful?
When they told him, "Go big or go home," he/she only had one option.
Mommy, mommy! Are we drug dealers?
Shut up and cut the coke.
Memes
Son: Dad, I'm gay.
Dad: I support you.
Son: I like you.
Dad: Get out and into my room!
What happens when an orphan is told that someone had found their parents?
They cry...
They scream... with joy.
"Oh wait, no, that wasn't your parents."
Orphan grabs a knife out of the kitchen, lets just say, the orphan didn't live to tell the tail...
What do Indians call their father when they are born?
Data.
Dads are like boomerangs, I hope.
If you're bored, punch an orphan. What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?
What’s the favorite song of someone with an Oedipus Complex?
“My Mommy Comes Back”
What's an orphan's favorite toy? A boomerang, because it comes back.
I saw my sister sucking a big toe.
Why did the teacher yell at the orphan?
Because he didn’t do his homework.
Why are orphans so bad at baseball?
Because they couldn't run home.
I asked my dad, "Are we there yet?" and he told me, "Don't worry, son, it will be a short ride!"
My mom bought me a car, and she called me an ungrateful b*tch because I sat in my wheelchair the whole time.
Man, my brother has a tight, buttered butthole. The veins in my cock throb when he comes over!
I have a better version of this joke.
How to make a plumber cry: Simple, kill his family. That’ll definitely turn on the waterworks.
Why do orphans hate playing sports in school?
Because they never get picked.