Family jokes
What's the difference between an orphan and baseball?
In baseball, you know where home is.
Why don't orphans care if they get in trouble? They can't call their parents.
When you ask your friend, "Can I hear a joke?"
"Sure."
"What do orphans and orange peels have the same?"
"What?"
"They both get thrown out."
Why did the orphan go to jail? Because he could finally have a home.
Why can’t orphans have milk?
Because their dad never came back.
So I got my brother a jumping castle for his birthday. That bitch cried in his wheelchair.
Friend: You're adopted.
Orphan: At least I was chosen!
Friend: At least I was kept.
Why do orphans get in trouble at school?
Because the school doesn't have any parents to report to.
Huggy Wuggy and Kissy Missy had a baby.
They never gave him a name, so they just played cut the rope with him...
How do you make an orphan's hands bleed?
You make them clap until their parents come home.
Name something an orphan can't do?
Go cry to their mommy.
I have a secret crush on your momma.
Guess why a lot of orphans were in "Home Alone"? Because their family left them.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because they don't know where home is. :)
Your mother.
If you are ever mad, punch an orphan.
What are they going to do? Tell their parents?
Why do emo kids sneak up on their Vietnamese grandfathers? Because they hope the war experience kicks in.
Why does an orphan hate the internet?
Because he's always on the homepage.
Why do orphans love role-plays?
Because they can call someone "daddy."
Why do orphans have water with their cereal?
Because the dad never came back with the milk.