Family jokes
What's the difference between parents and a boomerang?
The boomerang comes back from the store with milk.
Why can't an orphan use an Apple iPad?
Because it can't find the home button...
Q: Why did baby shark cross the Pacific Ocean?
A: To find his dad.
This had me wheezing 😂🤣😂🤣
What’s the difference between apples and orphans? Apples actually get picked.
Why can't an orphan play football? Because they can't find home or return it.
Memes
What's the difference between an orphan and a corpse?
One of them has someone to mourn them.
What did the orphan want for Christmas?
Parents.
Why can't orphans exit out of their games? They don't have a home button.
Where do orphans shop? Home Depot.
An orphan died. No one cared, why? Who is supposed to spread the word? His parents.
What do you call a mom that is yours?
Your mom!
Hi Mom, how are you doing?
A: Why did the orphan not come to school today?
B: Because today we had a parent meetup.
Q: How can you spell cold with two letters? A: IC (icy).
Q: What state is surrounded by the most water? A: Hawaii (this is really just a trick riddle).
Q: David's father had three sons: Snap, Crackle, and what's the third son's name? A: David.
3 year old boy: 1... 2...uh....?
Older brother: Ooh I know! 1, 2, 3 get the fuck off my apple tree!
Stevie Wonder is a terrible father.
He never sees his kids.
Why does an orphan only have a Samsung? Because it doesn't have a home button!
Why can't orphans steal bases?
Because they can't find home.
So an orphan goes to the store and gets a bunch of cartons of milk.
The cashier goes, "Woah, why so much?"
The orphan goes, "My dad never came back with the milk, so, well, here we are!"
You know that you f**k better than dad?
I know, mom says that too. (Typical Alabama Family)