Family jokes
What's the difference between a boomerang and parents to an orphan?
The boomerang comes back.
My grandma walked up on my doorstep and I grabbed my bible... I thought she was a smurf...
Why didn't the orphans stay at the park for days? Because they had no one to pick them up.
What's an orphan's best friend? A boomerang because it's the only thing that ever came back.
I saw your mom at work the other night. She was talking about how good she was doing.
Hands down, best $20 blowjob ever.
Bully: Ha, guess what?
Nerd: What?
Bully: You are adopted.
Nerd: At least I was wanted!
Why can't an orphan build a website? Because it won't have a homepage.
Your hairline goes back further than when my gran died, and she was buried 6 foot under.
Why does an orphan go to church?
So it has someone to call father.
What's an orphan's favorite game to play on Roblox? The game Adopt Me.
If you're ever bored, just punch an orphan.
What are they gonna tell their parents?
What is an orphan's favorite toy?
A boomerang. Unlike its parents, it comes back.
What's the difference between an orphan and a bowl of apples?
The apples got picked!
Why do orphans hate apples?
Because they get picked over.
Sister: Why does shampoo have directions?
Me: 'Cause God made you.
How do blind kids get punished?
By moving the furniture around the house.
Why do orphans wish they had a bounty on them so that they can be wanted?
I intern at an orphanage that burned down this weekend with 30 kids inside.
Thankfully, I don’t have to call and tell their parents.
You know, having an uncle is a good thing sometimes! I get a pair of shoes every week. He says it’s my reward for playing the tickle game with him in his damp and dark basement. It hurts sometimes. But hey, new shoes!
Why don’t orphans play baseball?
They don’t know where home is.
Little Jonny fucked his mum.