Family jokes
All these 9/11 jokes need to stop.
My uncle died in 9/11. At least he died doing what he loves: flying planes.
I met a baseball player, so I told him to make a home run, and he just looked at me with sadness. I don't know why.
By the way, he was an orphan.
Why can't an orphan win a baseball game?
Because they can't reach home.
His gay ass dad.
Dad: I heard an actor killed themselves with a knife. It was Reese something.
Mom: Witherspoon.
Dad: No, with a knife, you dummy!
What’s an orphan’s least favorite school event? Homecoming!
Your mother's hairline is sooooooo long cause Dora the Explorer could not explore it.
Your dad's hairline was so long that he died.
I'm such a good babysitter because the last person I babysat was so flat.
Why is it okay to hit an orphan?
It's not like they're going to tell their parents.
Orphan: Can I go outside?
Coworker at orphanage: Go ask your mom.
Orphan: WAWAWAWAWAW
"Your mum has very small balls. Congrats! I told her, your balls are bigger than your husband's."
I am Mario's brother.
Orphans have 363 days on a calendar because they don't have Mothers' or Fathers' Day.
Why do orphans go to church?
To call someone "father."
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because they can't hit a home run.
The orphan's best friend wanted to meet his family, so he took a selfie.
The orphan turned 18, but he was happy because he didn't have to pay rent to his parents.
I try and try every day, but 5 keep coming out. There's so money at this point my walls are built of babies.
Yo mama so fat when she walks the earth talks!
LMAO