Family jokes
Orphans have 363 days on a calendar because they don't have Mothers' or Fathers' Day.
Why is the orphan happy when he wakes up from a coma?
Because there is a family reunion.
What's the difference between apples and orphans?
Orphans don't get picked.
What's the difference between an orphan and a pencil?
People actually have a use for one of them.
What's the difference between an orphan and a dog?
One of them is actually loved.
Your sister is so ugly that she made an onion cry.
Why do orphans hate dodgeball?
No one misses them.
Why are orphans so bad at dodge ball?
They don't have a home to run to.
What is the difference between an orphan and a phone?
A phone has a home button.
How did the blind boy's parents punish him?
Rearrange the furniture.
A man went hunting with his son and shot an animal.
The father asks the son to identify the animal he just shot, and the son answers: "Holy Cow!"
Father: "What do you mean, 'Holy Cow?'"
Son: "You shot a hole in the cow, of course!"
Why can't orphans be gay? They got no one to call "daddy."
You and your sister always get into a fight and she says, "I don't care." Then you say right away, "About you!"
Why can't orphans play baseball? They can't run home.
Heh, stupid orphan.
Why don't orphans understand dad jokes?
Why do orphans say, "Go big or go home?"
So that way they feel important.
What is the other word for an orphan?
Paren't.
What is a show an orphan will never be able to relate to?
"Full House".
Your mom is so old that her birth certificate says "expired."