Family jokes
What’s the same between a pregnant 14 year old and her fetus?
They’re both saying “Oh my god my mom’s gonna kill me!”
Why can’t orphans play baseball?
Because they can’t run home.
If a kid refused to go to bed, does that make them guilty of resisting a rest?
What do James Doyle and Hannah Doyle have in common?
John fucked them both in the rear.
Person: You suck!
Me: Tell that to your mom, and she’ll say the same thing, honey. 😎
Memes
The son margarine shows his father his test that he failed.
Father: Son, you can do butter!
My mom said, "You are in big trouble!"
I said, "Are you going to punish me?"
Knock, knock!
Who's there?
Dad!
Dad who?
*Silence*
Blood may be thicker than water, but yo mama is thicker than anything!
I once saw a kid walking down the street crying. So I asked them, "Hey kid, where are your parents?" And he started to cry even more...
"Huh. I wonder why he was so sad..." I said as I walked into the orphanage.
What's the difference between an apple and an orphan? One of them gets picked.
What do parents feeding their kids and terrorists have in common?
“Here comes the airplane!”
What does the A stand for in "orphan, adopt" from the orphan company?
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Not your parents :) so kawaii fr.
What is the difference between Juice Wrld and an orphan?
One is loved by all.
What's an orphan's favorite meme?
Homer going into a bush.
Might take a while to notice and this one is bad.
All orphans must hate the LGBTQIA+ because they are home-o-phobic.
What is the difference between an orphan and a blanket?
One is actually used.
I was going to make a depressing joke, but my parents already did.
What's the last thing Asians hear from their parents?
"My money is my money. Your money is my money. Your wife's money is my money. Always remember that, son."