Family jokes

Kenny is living with his girlfriend now.

He just moved back in with his mom.

Why can’t orphanage kids play baseball?

Cause they don’t know where home is.

What do you call a group of redneck superheroes?

The Inbredibles.

Grandma told me that when she passed away she wants to be a tree, and so she could live forever.

But I'm not gonna lie, it was a nice toasty fire...

If your kid beats up an orphan, what are they going to do? Tell their parents?

Who are you?

Oh, I'm an orphan!

Oh... bye! :/

When you're bored, punch an orphan. What are they gonna do, tell their parents?

What would an orphan ask for Christmas?

"A someone."

In the new Grinch, the Whos would say he stole Christmas, "Get him!" Then the Grinch said, "I'm an orphan!" That changes everything. The Whos said, "What would they do if Max was an orphan?"

When you accidentally choke your girlfriend to death and then realize that it's your sister so who gives a f**k?

It's really great that you can make fun of orphans, 'cause what are they going to do? Tell their parents?

My grandmother said goodnight...

She never said good morning.

A hillbilly female has to decide if she would save her brother or her boyfriend. She chose both because her brother is her boyfriend.

Why can’t orphans celebrate Christmas?

Because they have no family.

I like my kids like I like my lamps.

Hung from the ceiling.

The doctor told me I had aids. I said, "It's your fault, sister."

I will always remember my dad's last words....

"15 dollars and I'll jump."

I'll always remember my dad's last words... "Why do you have an axe? We live in the city!"

I was on a plane and my mom said, "It's just a little turbulence."

And I said, "Mom, we just got on the runway!"

What do you do when you see a sad orphan?

Nothing, let them wait for their parents.