Family

Family jokes

Church

  • Ok, here's a story about the church.

    There were two parents, then they had a baby. Then they go to the church and the baby was getting a cross on his forehead. Guess he was big headed. Sorry if this offends anyone or makes this joke bad since I keep writing this.

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  • Orphanage

  • I saw a little kid crying today. I asked where his parents were, and he started to cry more. I left the orphanage to get some milk after that.

    Bag

  • Why can’t organs have a family bag of chips?

    Because they have no family to share it with.

    Sex

  • My friend said having sex is a lot like your first football game.

    You're bloody and bruised, but at least your dad was there.

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  • Sister

  • My sister said that if you go to a random person's door, the sister will all Waze open it.

    Octopus

  • Cousin: Hey, is that an octopus?

    Me: Yes, what, it is just an octopus.

    Cousin: Oh yeah, ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh! Octopus touch me!

    Me: What, it is just one..... ummmmm dad cousin d[id].

    Part

  • 💔 The Broken Family 💔 . Part 1

    Girl: Mom, dad tried to have sex with me last night.

    Mom: Are you serious?? (Shocked)

    Girl: Yah. He said I must kiss him after he didn't want to let me go.

    Mom: Am gonna kill ur dad (Angry)

    Girl: Please mom, we still need him, who will buy use food and clothes. You don't have a job mom.

    Mom: But what he did was wrong.

    Girl: I know.

    (SOUND OF A CAR COMING IN)

    Mom: Is that ur dad.

    Girl: Yes Mom

    Comment Part 2

    Orphan

  • Why are there only 362 days in an orphan's calendar? They don’t have Father's Day, Mother's Day, or Family Day.