Family jokes
Your mom is so fat that Dora couldn't explore her.
What's one plus one?
Yo mama.
Why can't orphans get 5 stars in GTA?
Because they're not wanted.
I got my son a bike for his birthday. The ungrateful fucker just sat in his wheelchair all day crying.
Your dad? Oh wait, you don’t have that!
Your hairline is so far back my dad even took 48 hours to reach it.
Me: Hey, are your parents home?
Orphan: (crying) Stop calling here!
What is the difference between an apple and an orphan?
The apples get picked.
I started crying when Dad was chopping onions.
Onions was a good dog.
Why do orphans die young?
The apple doesn't fall far from the tree.
I saw you when I got chance at the adoption center!
Hi, are you even my sister?
Yes, I am.
No, you're not, because you never even existed as my sister.
When I was born, I saw you at the adoption center alone.
That day your dad got milk. 😬😬😬😬😬😬😬😬😬😬
You know, having an uncle is a good thing sometimes! I get a pair of shoes every week. He says it’s my reward for playing the tickle game with him in his damp and dark basement. It hurts sometimes. But hey, new shoes!
Orphans are so useless even their parents agree.
"Suck me off, daddy, I'm doing homework."
Why can you hit an orphan?
Because they can’t tell their parents.
Why can’t orphans learn about ancient times?
Because they don’t know what a mummy is.
The guy called up to the orphanage, then he asked, "Where are the kids' faces?"
Then another guy said, "Sorry, there's no homepage."
Why are orphans bad at baseball? Because they can't hit home runs.