Family jokes
Q: What's an orphan's favorite game?
A: The Sims 4, because then they can simulate having a family.
Why can you hit orphans?
Because they can't tell their parents.
What did the parents rearrange the furniture to punish a child?
Guess he was a stupid blind motherfucker 🖕 that didn't even know how to use a cane to figure out where they put the furniture.
I feel wrong. What does this make us?
Still cousins.
Last night little Johnny went to his room and saw people hanging out there, little balls.
I'm 17, right? Anyways, the other day my parents told me a joke they made 17 years ago, but they still haven't told the joke yet.
His gay ass dad.
The joke I'm telling is my brother, Joey.
My dad is really angry at me for kicking the balls. He's the one that told me always aim for them. Is that why I don't have a brother?
Hey, that's the thing my grandpa has. They say that to treat it, I should call him a bitch!
Are you a marry, because you are my mother?
Stop making 9/11 jokes, guys! My uncle died in that event. He was the best Arabian pilot in the world!
Orphans are lonely.
What's an orphan's least favorite movie? Spiderman: No Way Home.
Why did the orphan get an iPhone X for his birthday?
Because it has no home button.
My dad is so good at instruments, he said he loves to finger "a minor."
I pushed an orphan and they said, "I'm telling!" I asked, "Telling who? Your parents?"
My brother apparently has this thing called "asthma". Anyway, I took his vape away today, and he was lying on the floor gasping for air, lol. He must really be addicted to it.
What do vacuums and your mom have in common?
They both suck.
My great-great-great grandpa killed Hitler.