Face jokes

Someone said to me when it was winter it[’]s time for you to “chill out.” I was like 👁👄👁

Knock, knock.

Who's there?

A dragon.

A dragon who?

The dragon gonna drag its balls across your face.

You got the whole crowd of people laughing when looking at you.

That face needing some laughing pills.

So I'm reading Hamlet, right? And then this one page they like, "Yo, like, Hamlet the fuck t tgo foff off KING speak, yo" 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂 truth ong fr 😂 Face with thing is funny or... 😂 😂 😂 😂 the

What do you call an emo's face?

Elmo's son.

What should I sell my dragon for?

Dragon these balls across yo face!

Why doesn't Laila in UHS need an insult?

Have a look at her face!

I love friends.

Yo mama so ugly, she made everybody's face fall off.

Why did the steward not receive his passport? Because his face was not valid!

The fact I couldn't hear the announcements at my school because the boys in my advisory are clapping with no hands should be a joke just in itself. They were making sexual faces as well, oh, and don't forget the moaning they do.

In kindergarten, we were starting to learn how to use "big kid words." On Monday, the teacher asked everyone to share what they did over the weekend, but we had to use big kid words.

Eventually it got to my turn, and the teacher asked me what I did over the summer. I told her I read a book. She asked me what book, and to remember to use "big kid words." I'll never forget the horrified look on her face when I replied with "Winnie the Shit."

What did one condom say to the other condom as they were passing a gay bar? "Let's go get shit faced!"

Q: Why was Barbie kicked out of the toy box?

A: She sat on Pinocchio's face and said, "Lie to me!"

What did the teacher say when he raped his naughty student?

"Face the wall!"

A drunk walks out of a bar late at night and sees a nun walking past on the footpath. He utters something hateful to himself as he begins running, building momentum before launching himself at the nun, catching her with a massive superman punch to the back of the head, knocking her tumbling brutally to the pavement.

He proceeded with a swift kicking to the nun's ribs and spine before grabbing the nun by the scruff of her habit and lifting her limp to her feet till face to face. Looking the nun dead in her eyes with menace, the drunk victoriously growled, "You're not so bloody tough tonight, are ya, Batman?"

I hate it when people say to suck it up... I mean, sometimes I don’t want someone’s dick in my face.

Ex Of Johnnys: I have a question.

Johnny: What?

Ex Of Johnnys: Am I pretty?

Johnny: Yes ofc jesus made everybody wonderfully!

Ex: Awhh!

Johnny: But whoever made you was painting Thomas the Train while making your face.

What is an emo's most hated game? Hangman.

Because it's rubbing it in their face that they can't hang themselves.

What are you going to have for a face when the baboon wants its butt back?