Event jokes
What's the emergency number, Jimmy?
Jimmy: 9/11!
I don’t usually tell 9/11 jokes, they usually crash and burn.
My elderly relatives liked to tease me at weddings, saying, “You’ll be next!”
They soon stopped though, once I started doing the same to them at funerals.
Why were 9/11 victims so mad?
They ordered three pepperoni pizzas, not two planes!
Why didn't the skeleton go to prom?
He was dead. You fool. You fell for my trick. I'm very heartless.
Oh wait.
You fool!
Memes
I was going to tell a 9/11 joke, but it was really plane.
Before: Caring & Noble.
After: Chernobyl.
What does a man with no arms or legs do on Halloween?
Nothing.
Someone dies.
Why is 10 afraid?
Because it’s in the middle of 9/11.
Just saw the news that Kobe passed. I guess there's a first for everything.
What do you call field day in Africa?
The Hunger Games.
How did people bully Helen Keller? They said, "Wow, that was the coolest thing ever! You really should have seen it!"
When you're born on 4/20/69...
What's the difference between COVID and 9/11?
I've never heard of someone dying in a car accident, and the media blaming it on 9/11.
Did you hear about the fire at Noelle's place?
Her sister is a real Dess-ember!
What’s one thing you can say during a wedding and in bed?
I didn’t know we were having seafood tonight!
I took my sister and cousin to a sleepover with lil Diddy, who my dad's friend has connections with.
I think the experience went fine, but they were traumatized. We got what we wanted.
My first football game was a lot like my first time having sex.
I was bloody, sore, and but at least my dad came.
I bet the emo kids are jealous when they go to a funeral.