Erection jokes

What does General Grievous say after he gets his penis growth pills?

A fine addition to my erection.

What do you call a skeleton's erection?

A boner.

What’s the difference between an erection and Edward Holland? Nothing, they're both dicks.

What's the difference between an erection and Edward Holland? Nothing, they're both dicks.

Now you should let your imagination work... imagine naked Jesus with an erection... and nail holes in his hands...

When I was young, I decided to go to a medical school.

At the entrance exam, we were asked to re-arrange letters

'PNEIS'

and form the name of an important human body part which is most useful when erect.

Those who answered 'SPINE' are doctors.

A married couple are on holiday in Italia. They look at the Leaning Tower of Pisa. He says: - Look, honey, this tower is crookedly standing! She: - Shut up!

(Standing means: penis erection)

Confucius says, "Man who walks through airport door sideways with erection, is going to Bangkok."

What does a necrophiliac get at a wedding?

Mourning wood.

Why did the guy take a bath? Because he came, and it was too much of a mess.

A child has diarrhea and asked his mom for a Viagra. "Why in the world do you want that?" she asked him. He looks at her and says, "Well, that's what you gift dad when his shit won't get hard."

What do you call it when a lizard can’t get a boner?

Ereptile Dysfunction!

a man died with an erection. the three nurses in the morgue saw this the first nurse climbs on and rides him. the second nurse dose the same the third hesitates saying "i'm on my period." the others say its ok hes dead so she rides him to. when she's done he sits up and all the nurses ask how hes alive he replies i'm good to go after the two jumpstarts and blood transfusion

What do you call a Native American with a boner?

A redwood.

What is the difference between light and hard? You can go to sleep with a light on.

It ain't always having erectile dysfunction, but it sure as hell ain't hard.

Q: How can you tell the sun is a boy?

A: It rises every morning.

So you can't pay rent and you know you're going to get evicted, but all of the sudden you hear a knock on your door and it's your landlord, but he's naked and erect, and on his cock, it says, "Your rent is due."

What do you get when you throw a baby into the wheat thresher?

An erection.

What's the difference between a Lamborghini and an erection? I don't have a Lamborghini.