Education jokes
We were discussing cows in a lesson. I asked my teacher why she was one.
I adopted you. Now say goodbye, you missed your Spanish lesson...
I was at school one day, and my teacher gave me homework. Once I got home, I did not do my homework, but I watched TV. After the movie, I finally went to go do my homework. I was almost done with my homework when I got to the last question. I didn't know the answer, so I asked the closest living being to me, which was my dog, and I asked him: what's two minus two? He said nothing.
I can’t wait for collage....
5 min later, ight I’m gonna go kill myself.
Hi 👋 magic school 🏫.
Why is a waiter good at math?
Because he knows his TABLES! 🤣
Why can't you teach an orphan new tricks?
Because there is no one to teach them.
What's 2+2?
4.
I have to say my humor isn't the best, but I'll give this a go.
My science teacher always reminded us about kilometers per second. Now I want to kilometer per second.
You know those credit card inserters at Walgreens? I want to insert my credit card on my wrist.
I'll shut up now.
So, Dad is teaching his 8-year-old son about the planets and said, "This is Uranus." Then the 5-year-old son says, "Where is my anus?"
There are 25 letters in the alphabet, and yet I don't know why.
Lenda: Hey, can you help me with my homework, please?!
Genda: Okay, and if I do, you won't make a fuss about it!
Lenda: I'll try!
3 mins later.
Genda: THAT IS NOT THE RIGHT ANSWER!
Lenda: Then what is 90 million?
Genda: WHA WHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Lenda mocking her: WHA OH YEAH YOU ARE A TERRIBLE TUTOR!!!!!!!!
4 mins later.
Genda: What is the capitol of watchington?
Lenda: Uh.....Idaho!
Genda being sarcastic: Yes...it is not the capitol of watchington...BECAUSE IT IS A STATE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Lenda: Oh, you mean Iowa!
Genda: UHHHHHHHHHHHH CUSS WORD!!!!!!!!!!
Lenda: U can't help that I'm the smart one...okay sweetie now you go be dumb and I go be smart! LATER SISTER! Oh wait, can you help me with my homework?
Genda: NO! You the smart one so you do it!
I asked my class what comes before 47. Everyone said 46, except for the quiet kid who said, "AK."
What does an orphan do on school parents' day? Nothing.
One of my students asks, "Can I have a bookmark?"
A year of school and they still don't know my name is Danny.
Why can’t orphans go to school? Because they don’t have a parent to sign them up.
What do you call a school bus with 30 kids?
A killstreak.
Why can’t a blind person be a teacher? Because they can’t control their pupils.
Why did the orphan get 1 mark out of 6 from a project yesterday? Because it was a family tree project.
When 9/11 happened, we changed our airport policies. When school shootings happen, we haven't changed anything since the shooting at Columbine in 1999. And we say we want the children to be safe.