What did the skeleton say to the other? "Wow, that song, 'Spooky Scary Skeletons,' really does send chills down my spine!"
What fell down the tree first, the emo or the apple?
Guess what? The apple, because the emo got left hanging.
When the school shooter says, "Everybody get down!" and the autistic kid thinks it's Simon Says: 🙋♂️🙋♂️🙋♂️
What do you call a bunch of sheep rolling down the hill?
A. A lamb slide.
I’m like an escalator because I’m always letting people down.
What is Harry Potter's favorite way to get down a hill? Walking, JK Rowling.
A woman walks onto the bus with her child. The driver says, "That's the ugliest child I have ever seen!" The woman sits down and tells her neighbor. The neighbor replies, "Go say something back. Here, I'll hold your monkey for you!"
Roses are red, your eyes are brown; never gonna give you up, never gonna let you down.
You're so ugly, when you went to the makeup store, it shut down.
I told the last person I slept with I was pregnant. He freaked the fuck out but calmed down after he realized it was April Fools'.
The look on my cousin's face was hilarious.
Last time I talked to my girlfriend, she was yelling at me to put the hammer down.
Today is the day of 9/11, and we were in class making jokes, and somebody said, "That's sad." I was like, "Why?" And they said, "Today is the day the towers went down." I said, "Just like I did on your mum last night."
My syndrome may be down, but my hopes are up.
Tibia honest, it takes a lot of spine to memorize all the bones in the skeletal system. I mean, there's a skele-ton of em! You gotta be boned up for the skeletal system exam, buddy chum pal. Now that was a humerus ribtickling skelepun. Besides, if ya don't know all of the bones in the skeletal system, get boned, fucking numbskull. Did those tickle your funny bone? Now I've been working down to the bone typing these puns, kid. Now if you hate all these, I won't be bothered, I got thick skin! But first, lemme take a skelfie in the skelevator playing my trom-bone. Now, I gotta go to Grillby's. They got a discount on spare-ribs. Bone-voyage, my homeslice breadslice dawg.
This one kid I knew had Down syndrome, and he turned a mirror upside down trying to get rid of it.
Man walks into a bar and sees a bear serving drinks... Sits down looking astonished. The bear says, "what's the matter you never saw a bear serving drinks?" The man says, "it's not that, I just never thought the moose would sell the place."
Why don’t cannibal kids eat people with Down Syndrome? Because kids don’t like vegetables.
Me: *gets down on one knee*
Girlfriend: OMG, it's finally happening!
Me: *falls over*
Girlfriend: The poison is kicking in.
Comebacks when someone say: Bully: "Your teeth is so yellow that when you start smiling you slow down the traffic." Say: "At least its brighter than your future."
I always hated being born a Catholic as a kid. The way you have to keep kneeling down, bending over, and standing up all within a few minutes of each other while at church. I was always thinking, “For God’s sake, just pick a position and fuck me!”
