DoS jokes
What kind of tea do wealthy people own?
Proper-Tea.
How do you stop a baby from crawling around in a circle on the floor?
You nail its other hand to the floor.
What do you call a cow with a twitch? Beef jerky.
What do you call someone who points out the obvious? Someone who points out the obvious.
Iβm giving in my two week resignation to life... itβs not you ... itβs me!!!
Memes
What do you call a Catholic priest who molests children?
A Catholic priest.
What do you call a joke without a punchline?
What do you call a happy child swinging with her friends at recess?
Not Sally.
Society: :-)
I: :')
Society: you're doing it WRONG. It's :-) not :')
I: :'D
Why do Java Programmers wear glasses? Because they don't C#.
Why do self-harmers "draw" on their arms?
Because everything they do is in vein.
Punchline: "Vain" sounds similar to "Vein".
what do you get when you play a country song backwards? you get your wife, your house, and your kids back.
What can an Olympic runner do that Hitler can't?
Finish a race.
What do you get when you cross jokes and cum?
CUMedy.
What do you call two Mexicans at a country restaurant? "Two beaners in a cracker house."
A blind man walks into a bar and asks the bartender, "Wanna hear a blonde joke?" The bartender replies with, "I'm blonde, the man working next to me is blonde, the woman next to you is blonde, and the fat guy behind you is blonde." Then says, "Do you really wanna tell the blonde joke?" The blind guy responds with, "No, I don't wanna tell it that many times."
What do you call a blonde who dyes her hair?
Artificial Intelligence.
What do jokesters eat for breakfast? Pun-cakes.
What do you call a bee that lives in America? A USB.
What do you call an alligator with a vest?
An investigator.