DoS

DoS jokes

Chick

What do a fat chick and a moped have in common?

They’re both fun to ride until your friends find out.

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  • Genie

    A guy walks into a bar and sees a 1-foot piano player over by the door. He goes over to the bartender, orders a beer, and says, “Man, how’d you get such a short piano player?” The bartender says in response, “There’s a genie in the back of the bar.” The man finishes his beer and runs to the back, looking for the genie. He finds it and says, “I wish for a million bucks.” Suddenly, a million ducks fly out of the bar. The customer looks confused and goes back to the bartender and says, “What just happened?” The bartender replies, “The genie is half deaf, do you really think I’d ask for a 12-inch pianist?”

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  • Priest

    What do you get when you combine a priest and lawyer? A Father-in-law.

  • 2
  • Memes

    George Washington

    Q: If George Washington was alive today, what would he do?

    A: Scratch mercilessly at the coffin walls, while screaming at the top of his lungs!

  • 0
  • Orphan

    Why do orphans bully people?

    Because they can't get suspended.

    Contact Parent _______

    Portal

    Me walking in to the office:

    Principal: Tell me, what did you do?

    Me: I told the special ed kid that the 4th story window was an end portal...

  • 2
  • Mistake

    A boy breaks a vase, and his mom says it's ok, honey, mistakes happen. How do you think you were born?

    Milk

    What do you call milk that gets everything she wants?

    Spoiled milk.

    Squad

    What do you call a bunch of depressed kids with AK47s?

    Suicide squad. 😂😂😂

    Orphan

    Why do orphans go to the ancient pyramids for vacation?

    In hope to find a mummy.

    Last Word

    I will never forget my grandfather's last words: “The fuck you doing with that knife?”

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  • Daughter

    Daughter: Mommy?

    Mom: Hey.

    Daughter: What kind of kids do they use to make Sour Patch Kids?

    Mom: They don’t use kids to make Sour Patch Kids.

    Daughter: Oh, that’s why the ones I made taste kind of funny...