Dont jokes
A lady comes into the boys' bathroom and a boy sees her.
"This is not a girls' bathroom," he says.
She answers, "I don’t care," she says, "I NEED TO PEE!"
How does a well-educated graduate approach a delicate situation?
I don't know, how does a well-graduated education approach a what?
With a degree!
Your momma is so fat, she doesn't need Wi-Fi, she is already worldwide!
I don't want to date an alien.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because they don't know where home is!
It took me years to figure out the Oreos served in Lunchables are knock offs. On the cover it says “Chocolate Crème Cookies.” I’ve believed this lie for as long as I can remember. Unless they were real back then? I don’t even know at this point. They sure as hell aren’t real now!
Don't challenge Death to a pillow fight.
Unless you’re prepared for the reaper cushion.
Don’t you hate it when you are driving in a school zone and the speed bump starts screaming?
Why don't butts get along?
Because they can't stand each other's cheek!
Why don’t rappers ever get cold?
Because they have so many fans!
Why don't booties get invited to parties?
They tend to CRACK people up!
Why don't rappers ever become chefs?
Because they can't stop droppin' the beet!
Why don't rappers ever play baseball?
Because they're too busy dropping hits!
I don’t have enough money to buy cheese, could you provolone me some money?
I would make a clock joke, but I don't have time.
"Well," he says, "It's what mommy calls me sometimes."
The little girl screams, "Don't eat it! It's a fucking asshole."
"You suck. I don't wanna be married anymore ://////"
When do you go at stop and stop when done?
I don't know, I'm not a pedophile.
If you are wondering where the dog went, I don't know. Maybe he went barking around.
Knock knock. Who's there? Hal. Hal who? Hal will you know if you don't open the door?