Dont jokes

Please don't make a joke about me; I'm just a human.

Why do French people eat snails?

Because they don't like fast food.

I watched a movie with a lot of ketchup on the ground.

I don't know why my friends look disgusted.

Don't listen.

Why do orphans not use iPhones?

Because they don't have a home button.

My friend: I want to cut myself.

Me: No, don’t do that. *hands lighter* Do this instead.

A king ordered to execute a gay man.

The gay man came and said, "Please don't behead me, have pity!" The king replied, "I will have pity because I will impale you, let you enjoy your last moments."

Confusion life question!!!

* Can you cry underwater? * Do fishes ever get thirsty? * Why don't birds fall out the tree when they sleep? * Why is a building called that when it's already built? * When they say dog food is new and improved, who tastes it?

Dark humor is like water, some people get it, some people don’t.

Is it a bird? Is it a plane?

I don't know, but it's coming for the towers.

My Mom said she's going to kill me if I don't stop using my computer.

Stalin asked Hitler if he wants to hear a joke.

Hitler says, “Yes.”

Stalin then says, “Moscow.” Hitler replies with “I don’t get it?”

Stalin laughs for a long time and says, “And you never will.”

Repeat after me: shut up; shut up; I don’t shut up, I grow up, and when I look at you, I throw up. 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

My science teacher was talking about natural selection.

At one point, she asked me to name the first person to theorize about it. I said, "Eric Harris." It was on his shirt.

If you don't get the joke, look up "Eric Harris natural selection."

Why don’t Mexicans have sex education and driver's education on the same day?

Because the donkey gets tired.

Did you know Africans don’t have to be black?

A guy goes into the gas station and says, "I need a box of rubbers with pesticide."

The cashier said, "Pesticide? Don't you mean spermicide?"

The guy says, "No! My old lady has had a bug up her ass all week, and I am going to kill it."

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, he can't tell me.

Why is there no medication in Africa?

Because doctors advised, "You don't take it on an empty stomach."

You like kissing boys, don't you?