Philanthropy jokes

What do chairs spend on the most?

Chair-ity.

What's big, bounces, and makes little kids cry?

My donation to the orphanage :)

If vegetarians eat vegetables, what do humanitarians eat?

I just donated $100 to a blind children's charity, suck that no one will see it.

Today I donated my watch, phone, and $500 to a poor guy. You wouldn't believe the happiness I felt as he slid the pistol back into his pocket.

Today, a man knocked on my door and asked for a small donation towards the local swimming pool. I gave him a glass of water.

I donated 100 dollars to a blind children’s charity. Too bad they won’t ever see a dime of it.

What is the difference between giving money to a prostitute and giving money to a church? A prostitute won't tell you that it is more blessed to give than it is to receive.

What is the difference between giving money to a church and giving money to the IRS?

If you stop giving money to a church, you won't go to prison.