DOE jokes
What does NASA stand for? Nobody Asked, Someone Answered.
Where does Caesar keep his armies?
Up his sleavies.
What does Stephen King call his wife...
The black hole.
Where does Stephen Hawking get his computer fixed?
At PC World.
How does the Eskimo make a house of cards?
Igloos it.
What does a lesbian call the other during sex?
Mummy.
What does a stray cat/dog have in common?
Both of them don't have a home!
How many babies does it take to paint a wall?
Depends how hard you throw them.
How many dead babies does it take to change a light bulb? Depends on how high your ceiling is.
How does an apple fall from a tree?
I don't know, ask Sir Isaac Newton!
A mom and her two children were eating at a place while playing trivia when she asked what does AIDS stand for? Her son Dallyn has no idea, but her daughter Emberlee, who has always been a little odd, says, "An Intentional Disease." Her brother and mom just stared!
What is it called if your mom does not make it to your birth?...
An abortion.
Little Johnny fucked a girl, ran away, fucked another, ran, went to the strip club, got a private dance, he has sex with them, fucking ran, yelled to some random bitch ass guy, "Fuck him, he's a bitch." He bends down, they have sex on the street, they go home, have sex, little Johnny wakes up, questions himself, fucking does it again. He goes to the strip club, fucks some more people, when he is drunk, questions himself some more, then tries phone sex, but his dick is too small.
Why does the pimp always use job fairs as a way of recruiting new hoes?
He always gets a great turnout.
W-what does, I mean uh, what is, um-, wh-what’s the difference, no... I mean- I mean what do you call a, um... sorry guys, i-i can’t do this. 😥🥺
*runs away in tears*
A fact! I think I'm officially a poo-buster, as the plunger does look like the weapon in "Ghostbusters"!
Why does Barry Bannan laugh when he plays football?
Because the grass tickles his balls because he's so short.
What does e equal?
I don’t know, a bunch of random numbers, but e=mc2.
What does the cell ride to work?
A vesicle.
What do you call an owl that does magic?
Hooodini.