DOE jokes
What does a French woman say when you ask her what her favorite video game is? "Oui, oui!"
Why does Adam go hockey, you might ask?
In my opinion, he shouldn't go because he is bad, but he needs the armor to protect himself from his own step-dad.
How long does it take a baby to cook in the microwave?
I don't know. I close my eyes when I masturbate.
How many tickles does it take for an octopus to laugh?
Why does Sally hate herself? Because Sophie stole her boy.
What shoes does a pedophile wear?
White vans.
How many dead strippers does it take to change a light?
At least 13 because my basement is still dark.
What kind of mountain does everyone like?
Mountain Dew!!! Hahah.
Why does Adam sleep early so his mum and stepdad can fuck on his bed?
What does a priest and a male homosexual have in common?
They both like to suck a big cock inside the men's locker room at the gym.
Does chocolate milk come from black cows?
What do you call a gay man that performs fellatio on a man and cunnilingus on a woman, a person who is curious about male bisexuality, a man that is bicurious?
Does it cycle now?
Why does Helen Keller look in the toilet after taking a poop?
Nobody knows!
How many dyslexics does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A man is dating three women and has to choose which one he'll marry. He decides to give them a test. He gives each woman a present of $5000 and watches to see what she does with the money.
The first woman does a total make-over. She goes to a fancy beauty salon, gets her hair done, new make up and buys several new outfits to look sexy for the man. She tells him that she has done this to be more attractive for him because she loves him so much. The man was impressed.
The second woman goes shopping to buy the man gifts. She gets him a new set of golf clubs, some new gizmos for his computer, and some expensive clothes. As she presents these gifts, she tells him that she has spent all the money on him because she loves him so much. Again, the man is impressed.
The third woman invests the money in the stock market. She earns several times the $5000. She gives him back his $5000 and reinvests the remainder in a joint account. She tells him that she wants to save for their future because she loves him so much. Obviously, the man was impressed.
The man thought for a long time about what each woman had done with the money... Then he married the one with the biggest breasts.
Hi guys, I'm going to be out for 3 days. Also, quote for the day and advice.
Quote. (Made by me) Don't look back at tomorrow; just look forward today. There are new thoughts, strength, and ideas.
Advice. Sometimes ppl have opinions, and those opinions are probably what you don't like, but don't bring negativity on them just because of what they're saying. If you chose, you probably say, "I don't understand that statement, but it does sound good." This is not a drama site; it's a joking site.
P.S. No hating in these comments.
How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall?
Depends how hard you throw them.
How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall red?
It depends on how hard you throw them.
Why does Adam buy airsoft guns, you might ask?
To defend himself against his own father... his life must be shit.
How many oz of water does it take to screw a light bulb?
None, also what the heck are you doing with water when people in Africa don’t have any?