DOE jokes
Why does Donald Trump love little boys? Because his hands look massive when he’s holding their tiny little prepubescent cocks.
What store does an orphan always get kicked out of?
Home Depot.
What do a relationship and suicidal thought have in common? They’ll both end soon.
What do parents and dark humor have in common? Not everyone gets them.
What do a prostitute and peanut butter have in common?
They both spread for bread.
How many orphans does it take to repair a house? None, they don't have one.
Why do orphans only have 363 days of the year?
Because they don't have a Mother's and Father's Day.
Why can't orphans see their parents?
Because they don't have one!
What does a Rubik's cube and a man's penis have in common?
The more you play with it, the harder it gets.
Where does a banana learn to split?
At sundae school!
Why does Elmo turn emo? Because he's Elmo emo.
Does anyone else here eat pretzels with Nutella? It tastes AMAZINGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG
Why does Peter Pan always fly?
'Cause he Neverlands.
What does one boob say to the other boob?
If we don’t get support, people will think we’re nuts.
What does the receptionist at a sperm bank say as clients leave?
Thanks for coming!
A penguin and a polar bear are sitting in a bathtub. The penguin asks the polar bear, "Hey, can you pass the soap?" The polar bear obliges.
A few moments later, the penguin asks, "Hey, can you pass the scrubber?" The polar bear does. Shortly after that, the penguin says, "Hey, can you pass the rubber ducky?"
The polar bear, beginning to become upset, turns to the penguin and says, "What do you think I am? A radio?!"
What does the sign on an out-of-business brothel say?
"Beat it. We’re closed."
What do you call a pig that does Karate?
What does a disabled disco play?
"When your legs don’t work like they used to before."
What kind of air does Ariana breathe?
Helium?