DOE jokes
Why does an orphan go to church?
So it has someone to call father.
What does an apple and an orphan have in common?
One gets picked.
What kind of bath bomb does an Emo prefer?
A toaster.
Why does Michael Jackson like 44-year-olds? There's 4 of them.
How many Senators fans does it take to change a light bulb?
All 3 of them.
Hockey for life!
I asked God why nobody likes me. He showed a reflection of myself.
What does my dad and Nemo have in common? They both can't be found.
How does a priest purify water?
Boil the hell out of it!
What does my dad have in common with Nemo?
They both can’t be found.
Why does USA suck at Clash Royale? They already lost two towers.
What does a baby and a grenade have in common?
They both make noise after you throw them.
Why does Sans say "I got a bone to pick with you?"
Because he needs to pick your balls.
Why does Michael Jackson like Chef Boyardee? He likes the little balls.
How does an emo kid compliment one another?
Like your cuts, G.
What do a crippled person's legs and the Twin Towers have in common? They both went down and never came back up.
What kind of food does a lesbian love? Anything they can eat out.
How does a train eat?
It goes, "chew chew."
What does LMAO mean? Launching Missiles At Orphanages.
There is a kid in my school who is exactly like Dahmer, but he doesn't eat ppl. Or does he...?
He's Dahmer's son @domink.
Once, there was a woman who had a husband and a dog. The husband dies.
The dog would always sleep under the bed, and when the woman would go to sleep, she'd put her hand down, and the dog would lick it to say she/he was alright. One night, it was thunderstorming. She put her hand down and the dog licked normally. She heard the dog whimper, so she put her hand down like normal, as the dog always does, he/she licks her hand.
Then she heard dripping coming from the bathroom, so she went to go stop the leaking that might be coming from the tap, but the tap wasn't on, nor was it dripping. She turns on the light and looks up at the roof to see if the roof was leaking but turns out her dog was hung by its head above the bathtub.
On the mirror it said, "Humans can lick too," in the dog's blood.
This is a true story, don't be afraid to look it up!