Disabled

Disabled Jokes

Piece

A slag is like the first piece of bread in a loaf. Everyone touches it, but nobody wants it.

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  • Wheelchair

    My girlfriend broke up with me because I stole her wheelchair.

    But I knew she’d come crawling back to me.

    People

    Why did people bully Steven Hawking?

    Because he couldn't stand up for himself.

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  • Man

    What do you call a man with no arms and no legs laying in a pile of leaves?

    Russell

    TV Show

    I asked this disabled kid what his favorite TV show is. He looked at me blankly and said "My favorite TV show is Vegetales."

    Vegetable

    This disabled kid walked up to me, so I asked what disease he had. He said, "Lima." So I said, "Come again?" And he said, "Lima nuts." And I asked if that was a fruit, and he said, "No, I'm a vegetable."

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  • Down Syndrome

    A boy with Down Syndrome was talking with his mom.

    “Mom, why did God make me like this?” he said.

    “It’s because God made you special,” she said.

    “Just kidding, I was only talking about your needs.”

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  • Braille

    Why did the kid who was blind, in jail, need light to see? He didn't, he needed to braille his way out.

    Wheelchair

    I know a girl in a wheelchair. I realize now why she couldn’t do sports because the coaches wanted 100% from her, but she was only able to give 50%.

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  • Kid

    Why did the disabled kid keep getting bullied?

    He couldn’t stand up for himself.

    Hand

    Look at your left hand, now look at your right hand, and tell yourself, "Which hand do you cheat with?"

    Wanking.