Disability jokes
My dog is called Syndrome. He jumps up at me and I shout, "Down, Syndrome! Down, Syndrome!"
How do you punish blind kids?
Put them in a round room and tell them to sit in the corner.
Stephen Hawking would be a bad Pokemon.
He'd always be paralyzed, and his only move would be tackle!
Why did Steven Hawking's snot not go to heaven?
Because there is no ramp to heaven.
Why did the one-handed man cross the road?
To get to the second-hand store!
Memes
Weaponization of flashlights
Why did Bob fall off the swing while playing? Because he had no arms.
Knock, knock. Who's there?
Not Bob.
How did Helen Keller lose her virginity?
I told her the plunger was stuck in the toilet, but she didn’t listen...
What do you call the girl with no arms and no legs?
Names.
Stephen Hawking went on a date and came back with a broken leg. I can't believe she stood him up.
How did Helen Keller's parents punish her?
They stuck her in a round room and told her to find the penny in the corner.
A girl named Sally has no arms.
"KNOCK KNOCK"
She never answered...
My syndrome may be down, but my hopes are up.
I told a blind man to read more, so he grabbed my arm and read the whole dictionary.
What do pedophiles call children in wheelchairs?
"Meals on Wheels."
What's black and sits at the top of the stairs?
Stephen Hawking during a house fire.
What were Stephen's last words? “Battery low.”
What's the difference between Stephen and a car? A car loses oil, Stephen loses the ability to walk.
How many cancer patients does it take to change a lightbulb? 10, 1 to change the lightbulb, 9 to talk about how inspired they are?
Where do you find a dog with no arms or legs?
Where you left it.
Why did little Susie fall off the swing?
Because she has no arms or legs.
Knock knock.
"Who's there?"
Not Susie.