Disability jokes
Why can't Stephen Hawking be the real Slim Shady?
Because he can't stand up, can't stand up.
Your disabled joke on you can't stand.
How do you beat Hellen Keller in musical chairs?
You move the chairs.
Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.
Knock, knock. "Who's there?" Not Sally.
So I got my brother a jumping castle for his birthday. That bitch cried in his wheelchair.
Q: How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? A: They put a plunger in the toilet.
Q: How many kids did Helen Keller have? A: None, the plunger went all the way up.
This mute kid was getting made fun of. I told him to speak up for himself.
It's so sad that Stephen Hawking has a whole category on here about him and he can't stand up for himself.
I told this knock knock joke to Helen Keller...
Me: Knock Knock
Her:
Stephen Hawking is the real Slim Shady... but he can’t stand up ☹️
If you are disabled and a comedian, is it called stand-down or sit-up?
Put a kid in a wheelchair in the Twin Towers. Damn, I love Hot Wheels!
I dumped the dead, disabled person's body into a dumpster full of rats.
One man said, "The audacity on that deaf kid!"
The other man said, "Bro, does he even have audio?"
Did you know that Helen Keller had a pet monkey?
No.
Neither did she.
I pushed a kid in a wheelchair into a fire and said, "Hot Wheels!"
What position would a man with no legs and arms play in baseball?
Home base.
What do you call an autistic kid with a gun? Special forces.
I did this to my ex. I stole her wheelchair. I knew she would come crawling back.
What do you call a fat spеaky in a wheelchair spеaky chair?