Disability jokes
I heard Microsoft got charged, why?
They couldn’t reboot Stephen Hawking.
What do you call Stephen Hawking when he eats too much?
As fat as Ben Dingley.
When Stephen Hawking died, he saw the stairway to Heaven.
He thought to himself, "Oh God, this is awkward!"
Why did he go to hell? Because he couldn't use the stairs to Heaven.
The reason why Stephen Hawking died is because he tried to overclock his wheelchair.
How did Stephen Hawking get up the stairway to heaven?
He didn’t, there was no lift...!
Q: What is the hardest part of a vegetable to swallow?
A: A wheelchair.
Why did Hellen hate when her dad yelled at her?
Oh wait, she didn’t know! 🤣🤣
This disabled girl started rolling after me, so I ran to the stairs.
I played piano at a Worthmore disabled elderly center. Then after I was done, I said, "How about you give me a standing ovation?"
I regret it to this day. Now I am forced to live here at Worthmore, and sit on my wheelchair, sad and lonely.
Why did Stephen Hawking go on to Britain's Got Talent?
To sing.
Balalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalala!
Why couldn't the orphan use the swing? Because they had no arms.
What did a comedian say at a show full of blind people?
"What's up?"
What do autistic retards and birds have in common?
They both flap their arms, lol.
What do you call a girl with no legs? Sarah.
What do you call an Olympic gold medalist skiing? Not Sarah.
You know what really grinds my gears? Robots and liars...for example that Stephen Hawking fella. He sure looks and sounds like a robot!! And a major liar too! If he wanted to show me how smart he really was he would have figured out how to get up out of that four wheeler and tell me how smart he is!!!!!
Damn, this computer stopped working. It's got autism.
Why did Sarah fall off the swing?
Because she has no arms.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Not Sarah.
So I'm the cable guy around the neighborhood, and I do everybody's cable. So I walked into this one house, and I noticed a little kid and the mom was upstairs. I was asking where her mom was, and she wasn't answering, and it looked like something was wrong, so I asked if anything was wrong. She didn't answer, so I kind of raised my voice at her, but she still didn't answer, and then I realized the hearing aid in her ear.