Disability jokes
What was Stephen Hawking's favorite band?
The Rolling Stones.
Person with no arms: Even though I have no arms, I can do anything you guys can.
Me: If you're happy and you know it, clap your hands. 👏👏 If you're happy and you know it, clap your hands. 👏👏
Person with no arms: 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
I'm funny but sad, I submit jokes you'll love. Look for my name in jokes you've read. Anyway.
What did the man with no hands get for his birthday? Gloves. Just kidding, he didn't have the chance to open the gifts.
When Helen Keller tries singing the national anthem at the Super Bowl,
Aaaaaaaaaa Aaaaaaaaaa Aaaaaaaaaa.
What makes Stephen Hawking and your dumped girlfriend similar?
They can't stand up for themselves.
The best news about a pretty girl with special needs is that you can get her to do exactly what you want her to do.
I mean, she probably thinks receiving oral is like 100% blood sausage coming right at her.
Steven Hawking walks into a bar, the bartender says...
WAITTTT WHATTT
They have a new line of socks for paraplegics. They are so comfortable they can't even feel them.
Bought my son a trampoline for his birthday. The ungrateful fucker just sat in his wheelchair and cried.
Guy with no arms: Even if I don’t have arms, I can do everything you can do.
🎵if you’re happy and you know it clap your hands🎵
When the school shooter is just about to leave your classroom, and you think you're in the clear, but the Down syndrome kid says, "Goodbye."
What did John say to little Timmy? Happy Disable day!
Why couldn't Stephen Hawking pass? Because he couldn't pass "I'm not a robot" test.
Why should you put an autistic person in a refrigerator?
Because otherwise you’ll get a rotten vegetable.
(Not meant to be triggering).
Why is Stephen Hawking going to hell?
Because it’s a stairway to heaven, not a ramp.
You're so ugly you make the blind kids cry 😭😭
What’s the hardest part of the vegetable to eat?
The wheelchair.
Mom: See that guy over there with no hands, tell him to clap.
Son: Mom, I'm blind.
Mom: Exactly!
Q: What do blind kids and orphans have in common?
A: Neither of them get to see their parents.
I'm in a wheelchair, right, so I've tried everything but one stand up.
It didn't work.