Disability jokes
Did you walk up Stephen Hawking's drive?
Don’t worry, he didn’t either.
"Did you guys make sure Stephen was plugged in?"
What were Stephen Hawking's last words?
*Windows turning off*
A person with a wheelchair makes a joke. No one laughs.
Inner thought: "Wheely Manerva, wheely."
Why does Stephen Hawking only do one liners?
He can't do stand-ups.
How did Stephen Hawking die?
Someone pulled his ethernet cable (he died of a blue screen)!
Did you ever walk into Stephen Hawking's house?
Answer: No, neither did he.
Why did Stephen Hawking walk across the road? Oh wait...
How did Stephen Hawking get up the stairway to heaven?
Hint: he didn’t.
The two biggest dyslexic guy lies: "My check is in your mouth," and "I won't come in your mailbox."
They don’t have to invest a lot into the Stephen Hawking wax statue, though.
Put Helen Keller in George Floyd's position. How would she cry out for help? Would she just moan, or would she try to do sign language?
Trump should be grateful for DEI.
How else could a mentally handicapped person be elected President?
Man, this walk is really good. Oh wait, you can't.
What do you say to an upset Down syndrome person?
I'd ask what's up, but it's definitely not you!
What's the hardest part of a vegetable to eat?
The wheelchair.
What is a victimless crime in the state of Michigan if you are an able-bodied man who is well-endowed, not white, and not a heterosexual male?
A white male who is heterosexual and physically disabled who is sodomized by an able-bodied and well-endowed gay male who is not white inside the men's locker room at the gym.
What is the definition of "Endless Love"?
Answer: Helen Keller and Stevie Wonder playing "Tennis"!
What does the dumb kid say to the blind kid?
"Long time no see!"
Me going to the principal's after telling the kid with a wheelchair to stand up for himself.