Disability jokes
"Actions speak louder than words."
This doesn't apply to Stephen Hawking, however...
What's a zig zag and made of wood?
Stephen's coffin.
Why is Stephen Hawking going to hell, not heaven? Because it's a stairway to heaven, not a ramp.
What do blind people take for granted? Sight.
My ex-wife was deaf. She left me for a deaf friend of hers.
To be honest, I should have seen the signs.
What is a retard's favorite race? The grand autismo.
What do you call Stephen Hawking on fire?
Hot Wheels.
Why was Sally sad?
Because she couldn't play pattycake. Sally doesn't have arms.
Q: How do you get a one armed person out of a tree?
A: You wave at them.
How do you confuse Helen Keller? You rearrange the furniture and glue doorknobs to the walls.
Why did Stephen Hawking and his wife stop playing hide and seek? She kept using a metal detector.
What's black and screams?
Stevie Wonder answering the iron.
Stephen Hawking got an engine swap with a Nissan 350Z, and they said his wheelchair wasn't street legal :/
Why are you so tired if you can’t see? Because you are blind.
Balalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalala!
Q: What's the hardest part about eating vegetables?
A: Putting them back in their wheelchair.
What's Helen Keller's favorite color?
Corduroy.
Why can’t you tell a funny joke to a wheelchair kid? Because he just rolls with the joke.
Why couldn't the kid with Down syndrome play football? Because he got all the downs.
Did you know that Helen Keller has a swing in her backyard?
Neither did she.