My future is so bright, i need a flashlight to see where i’m going
Depression Jokes
I wish my hair was depressed Cause then it would cut itself
people talking me asking whats the worst day in the year for them. Person 1: The first day of school cause i don’t like going to school
Person 2: Valentines day cause its to lovey
Me: oh nice mines my birthday cause its when i was born
My neck, my back, my crippling anxiety attacks
Friend #1: “Yo guys, what’s the most unfair game you’ve ever played? For me it’s Fortnite.”
Friend #2: “I’d have to say Monopoly.”
Me: “The most unfair game you say? Life, definitely. Like, no one wins, it’s a one-way game.”
Friend #2: “Uhh…that’s not exactly what he meant…”
Friend #1: calls the suicide hotline
Why was I stress eating on the train track?
To wait to get hit.
My mom told me its not healthy to stay in my room all day…but the only places I’m allowed to go to are my room and downstairs.
Lets make a joke on how depressing monday is to ignore how depressing everyday is.
They say I’ll mess up my insides, but I don’t have any.
All my jokes are cys for help
INCLUDING THIS ONE
If you drop an emo and a piece of paper from a tree which will hit the ground first?
The piece of oaper because the rope will stop the emo
why did the depressed person cross the road.
to get ran over.
Me: Knock knock…Friend: who’s there? Me: I don’t know anymore
Why can’t depressed people leave the maze?
Because their lives are the walls and they are to scared to meet the exit.
Depression is like therapy the more you see it the more you get used to it
Teacher : Who here has thought about committing suicide? Half of the class : raises hand Teacher : … The half of the class: Starts talking about how they were thinking of doing it
When you realize you have depression and depression realize how stupid you were
friend: hey,wanna play hid and seek? me:sure, i’ve got a great spot! me: grabs nuce and runs to my closet
A man walks to the window and opens it and pulls out his phone and takes a photo. “One more picture and I’ll jump.” He takes another photo and shuts the window. “I can’t jump, you’re not supposed to throw trash out the window.”
Are you depression 'cause you’re always on my mind~