Once there were twins, Mark and Michael. Mark was the owner of an old boat. It so happened that Michael's wife died the same day that Mark's boat sank. A few days later, a kindly old woman saw Mark and mistook him for Michael. She said, "I'm sorry to hear about your loss. You must just feel terrible." Mark, thinking that she was talking about his boat, said, "Heck no. In fact, I'm sort of glad to be rid of her. She was a rotten old thing right from the beginning. Her bottom was all shriveled up and she smelled like old dead fish. She was always losing her water; she had a bad crack in the back and a pretty big hole in the front too. Every time I used her, her hole got bigger and she leaked like crazy. I guess what finally finished her off was when I rented her to these four guys looking for a good time. I warned them that she wasn't very good, but they wanted to use her anyhow. The fools tried to get in her all at once and she split right up the middle!" The old lady fainted.
Why do orphans go to church on family day? cuz they get to spend time with their father.
Earlier that day.. Mars:Okay Venus, you need to stop with the puns Mission on space Mars:Moon?You okay? Moon:... Mars:Moon come on! Stop SPACING out! *Venus and Moon giving her the smirk*
Ryan: Mother, if you had 10 cookies, and I took 4 away from you, how much do you have? Mother: I will still have ten cookies, because I will not give any to you. Ryan: What if I forcefully take 4 cookies away from you. Mother: I will have 10 cookies and a dead body.
Ryan and his mother had cookies than day. Ryan took all 10 cookies. He was never seen again. R.I.P Ryan
A delivery service called ‘Ross deliveries’ was known to be the best in town. They never got anything wrong. One day, Rachelle got a delivery, but when it arrived, it was all broken! How is this possible?
I never said which delivery service she used. Lol.
It's April Fools' Day. I'm gonna go to the orphanage and tell kids, "Their parents are here to pick them up."
Once there was a man that was coming to my house and peeing in my yard then the man came back to my house and floped his penis every were and peeing at the same time and it went all over my face so the next day he came back and I got my Beebe gun and shot a medal beebee in to his peepee. this didn't actually happen
what is sharks favourite day chewsday
Did you hear about the guy that went to a nudist Clooney? The first day was his hardest
Sadly blind jokes are cruel. A kid at my school was punched the other day for being blind
Sadly he didn't see it coming
Mary had a lamb. Her fleece was black as coal. When I tried totouch it that night, next day I went to court.
Hi 👋 I love 💕 you love 💕 a good time of my day
What is the difference between the snow boots on the earth day today after dinner and walk home
What did a tree 🌳 I do for a human rights rights day at a tree 🌳 I had no time today after a night night with you today but you walk away
Why do Indians gamble so much? They are hoping to one day reclaim their land
when its April fools day go to a orphan and say there parents should come back
Why can’t a orphan celebrate Father’s Day and Mother’s Day becuse they have no parents
One day I was walking around, then saw this mom mad at her kid and screamed, "You're adopted!" He said, "Yeah, I know. My REAL mommy is still at home with daddy."
What is a difference between a human and human rights and a tree tree and a house that has to
Hi 👋 was the day you
