DA jokes

Bomber

    • What do Middle Eastern suicide bombers say before they blow up?

    I weel sho u wot da bom bom is! ALLAH!

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    • DA memes

    Cowboy

    • Why did the cowboy die with his boots on??

    He didn’t want to stub his toe when he kicked da bucket 😂🤣👌🏻👌🏻.. knee slapper

  • 0

    • George Floyd

    • If George Floyd was in the new Little Mermaid: Under da knee Under da knee Counterfeit 20 Drugs I took plenty Now I can’t breathe

  • 0

    • Diss track

    • It was 2017, and lots of people were hating RiceGum because he released "Frick Da Police," a diss track insulting Idubbbz's Content Cop video on RiceGum.

    A few hours after the diss track was released, someone went to Rice's house and spray painted "Asian Jake Paul" on the wall of the front of his house.

    Rice went to "meet" Idubbbz, then he saw the graffiti.

    "WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEREEEEEEEEEEEEEE?"

    Hours later, police found 4 suspects.

    "Explain."

    Sus 1: I don't vandalize.

    Sus 2: I was staying indoors because it was rainy.

    Sus 3: I fucking hate RiceGum, but I would not ruin his cheap ass house lol.

    Sus 4: I eat bricks.

    Police: I know who.

    RiceGum: Who?

    Police: ITS-

    807907070707007607865909685780970695067586708650968095768076895708769875660980765970659062870907965607867856067586908

    Notice anything in the number crowd?

    Comment the answer below and I will see who is correct.

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    • Bomb

    • "You're da bomb!" "No, you're da bomb!"

    In America, a compliment. In the Middle East, an argument.

  • 16

    • Sex

    • So... here's da scoop, alright... *licks KFC off lips* so, I was caught having sex wit three 6 year olds (girls btw, just in case you guys get mad) and da judge told me I was getting da death penalty, you know what I mean?

    I had a last resort to save myself though, you feel me? So I told da judge, I said to him, I said: "Yo honah, 6 + 6 + 6 = 18, you smell me?"

    Needless to say, I was announced a fre-e-e-e-e-e-e man after dat, you feel me?

    But then, the Predator Poachers nigckas just barged into the courtroom and they said: 4 + 4 + 5 = 13!

    Alas, I'm writing this joke from jail, and judging by the look my prisonmate Tyrone is giving me, I'll be writing jokes from hell from now on.

  • 3

    • Boat

    • One day Billy, Bob, and Doo Da went fishing in a small boat. None of them could swim, and they had no life jackets.

    Doo Da suddenly started yelling, "I got one boys!" as he started trying to reel the fish in. It was way too large for him to get onto the boat, and he fell into the water. The fish had a nice meal that night. Billy and Bob were in shock but knew they had to tell Mrs. Doo Da.

    Upon arriving at her house, they did rock, paper, scissors on who had to tell her the news. Bob lost. He slowly rang the doorbell, and Mrs. Doo Da answered. "U-uhm.. we...Doo D-Da..f-fish..." Bob stuttered, then he screamed and ran off. Billy went to go retrieve his friend. Billy had a nice little talk with him and slapped him across the face to get him to just say what happened. Soon, the two men returned to Mrs. Doo Da's house and rang the doorbell again. She opened the door and looked at the two men and asked, "I've been trying to call Doo Da, and he hasn't answered, is he ok?" Bob took a deep breath and took a step forward with a smile on his face. He sang, "We went fishing, guess who died, Doo Da, Doo Da. He smiled and he said good bye, we mourn Doo Da today."

  • 2

    • Bomb

    • "You da bomb!" "No, you da bomb!"

    In the US, a compliment. In the Middle East, an argument.

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    • Rape

    • A guy is on trial for leading a mob to gang rape a woman he'd taken out for a date. His defense is that he was helping her live out a fantasy.

    The DA is furious and asks him WTF gave him that idea. He said, "After the date I took her back to her house, pulled out my dick, and tried to hand it to her. She told me, 'You've gotta be fucking kidding me. Seriously, go get some help!'"

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