Cross jokes
Q: What did Jesus say when he got nailed to the cross?
A: Owwww!!!!!
What do you get if you cross hot wheels, hot legs? Hehe.
Why did the Canadian cross the road?
To say sorry to the other side.
Hey Hunter, Thomas here.
Why did the plane cross the road?
To get to the other side.
Thanks guys, remember to like it, means a lot!
Why did Mimi cross the road?
She had cancer.
When you try to sneak something
Why did the chicken cross the road to get to the other site? Ah hah hah hah hah!
What do you get when you cross a bunny and a Rottweiler? Just the Rottweiler.
You're the bunny, and I'm the Rottweiler.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To eat Bob's arms.
Bob went to hospital and had no arms.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Not Bob.
Why did Princess Diana cross the road?
She wasn't wearing a seat belt.
What do you get when you cross mums and makeup?
Beauty!
Guess what you get when you cross a dark side and your king?
How do you confuse a ginger? Throw a cross at them.
In the beginning of the 20th century, a young girl called Edit left her home country of Sweden and crossed the Ocean to make a new life in America. Unfortunately, it did not go all that well, and she soon found herself homeless, begging for food or money to survive.
She used to occupy a street next to a theater, not because it meant hefty handouts, but because it was a place where no other beggars or police bothered her. Every night, a new crowd came to see a show, and the cute young girl found just enough mercy to survive. In fact, she did so well that she decided to afford herself a small piece of cake every Tuesday, just to keep her spirits up.
One Tuesday, she could not get a break. Looked like she will go without cake this week. Then, a strange-looking gentleman stopped near her. He soon heard her story and decided to share his fortune.
Gentleman: "I work as a magician in the touring show; today, we performed here. Some nights, our guests want to gamble with us afterwards, and I make sure to bring home more than I came with. I try to keep it moderate, but today, this obnoxious drunk was loaded, so I emptied his pockets. Here, take this precious coin."
Why did the turtle cross the road?
To get to the “shell” station.
Why is the chicken that crossed the road a cannibal? Because he went to KFC.
Jesus was being hung up on the cross, and me and all the other people at the bottom of the hill were watching. Jesus cries out,
"Peter, Peter come to me!"
So I climb up the hill on my hands and knees, and when I reach the top, the Romans cut off my arms and chuck me back down the hill.
"Peter, Peter come to me!" cries Jesus once more. I stumble up the hill, then the Romans cut my legs off and threw me back down. For the third time, Jesus cries,
"Peter, Peter come to me!". So I wriggle up the hill, and I guess the Romans pitied me and let me through.
"Look Peter, I can see my house from here!"
What do you get when you cross a donkey with an onion?
A piece of ass that makes your eyes water.
Why did the terrorist cross the road?
To get to the airport!
What do you get when you cross a highway on a bike?
Run over.
Why did the liberal cross the road?
(Ah, fuck this shit, I'm gonna kill myself!)