What did the cat say to the jar of cookies?
"Ground beef!"
Dad I'm hungry hi hungry I'm dad 👋🍪🍩🍬🌮🍔🍗🍟🍤🍉🍭🍫🍰
What does a queen want on her cookie?
Royal Icing.
Mother: How is my little cookie doing?
Doctor: Your cookie is feeling crummy right now.
Mother: Really?
Doctor: But don’t worry. Things are about to get batter.
Mother: 😁♥️🍪
I just busted a nut. A ginger nut.
Little Johnny walks in on his grandfather smoking a cigar.
“May I smoke a cigar?” asks Johnny.
The grandpa replies, “Well, does your dick touch your asshole?”
Johnny replied, “No,” and left the room.
The next day Johnny sees his grandpa getting into a car.
“Can I drive the car?” asks Johnny.
“Does your dick touch your asshole?”
“No.”
The day after that, Grandpa sees Johnny about to eat a cookie.
“Johnny, may I have some of your cookie?” asked the grandpa.
“Does your dick touch your asshole, grandpa?”
“Yep.”
“Then go fuck yourself, this is my cookie.”
Four cows went to the county fair. They saw a sign that said that next year animals can enter a singing contest. They decided that they would enter next year. So they called their group the "4 Cs Quartet" since their names were Clementine, Candy, Cookie, and Columbine.
They discovered how they could win. After a discussion, they decided to eat as much corn as possible, so they would sing in perfect 4 part hominy.
How do you make Alabama cookies?
Put them in a big bowl and beat for three hours.
What's a homeless person's favorite cookie?
Pooreos.
Why did the Oreo go to the dentist?
Because he lost his filling.
What did the cookie say to the milk?
What’s up duud?
If you were a food, what would you be?
Friend 1: "Pizza, cause I'm so cheesy."
Friend 2: "Chocolate chip cookie, cause I have lots of friends."
Me: "Donut, cause I'm so empty inside."
Why did the Oreo go to the dentist?
🎉🎇🎊🎆🎈
I told a cookie a joke the other day.
It just crumbled.
What is red, green, lies in a ditch, and is covered in cookie crumbs?
...A girl scout that got hit by a car.
What do you call a white man having intercourse with a black woman?
An Oreo.
The FBI said open up. I shout them.
A person said cookie sale. I opened up. He fucked me
Hey, fatboy, why are you so damn fat?
Because every time I f*** your mom, she gives me a cookie.
Yo mama so stupid that, when she heard about cookies on the internet, she ate her computer.
Why do basketball players like cookies? Because they can dunk them!
