Computer jokes
What does Stephen Hawking press after he's had a hard day?
F5
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Jerk.
Jerk who?
This website who!
What is Bill Gates’ favorite equation?
1 + 1 =
Stephen Hawking's last words were, "Ethernet cable not detected, shutting down."
Where did Sally go during the bombing? Everywhere.
Your mama is so fat that when she was playing online, she crashed the whole server.
Why did Stephen Hawking die?
His Windows update wasn't available.
A blonde texts her husband on a cold winter’s morning: "Windows frozen, won't open."
Husband texts back: "Gently pour some lukewarm water over it and gently tap edges with hammer."
Wife texts back 5 minutes later: "Computer really messed up now."
Where do you take Stephen Hawking when he dies?
The Apple repair store.
Stephen Hawking only died because he tried to install Windows 10, and his hard drive corrupted.
The only reason Stephen Hawking died is because he forgot to update to the latest version of Microsoft.
What does it say on Stephen Hawking's grave?
"Rust in peace."
How did Stephen Hawking die?
Windows didn’t update in time.
What is the difference between a school bully and a feminist?
The school bully does not hide behind their computer screen.
So, the sea is on a computer but doesn't know how to search, so the computer said to the sea, "Search!"
Do you get it? SEArch.
Why are elephants scared of computers?
Because of the mouse.
What were Stephen Hawking's last words?
The Windows XP log out sound.
How did Steven Hawking die?
He forgot his log on password.
The reason why Stephen Hawking died is because he tried to overclock his wheelchair.
Guess McAfee doesn’t clear all computer viruses.
You do not spell "computer" like this; you spell it like this: "cumputer."