What's the difference between a blonde and your computer?
You don't want your computer to go down on you.
Q: How do you know when an Asian broke into your house?
A: Your math homework is done, your computer is upgraded, and 2 hours later he's still trying to back out of the driveway.
The first computer dates back to Adam and Eve. It was an Apple with limited memory, just one byte. And then everything crashed.
The reason Stephen Hawkings died is probably because he fell off his wheelchair, and he must've pressed shut down by accident.
A man was walking down the street with a swivel chair under one arm, a computer under the other, and a desk strapped to his back.
A policeman ran over to him and handcuffed him, saying, "I'm arresting you for impersonating an office, sir!"
How did Stephen Hawking die?
He tried to update to Windows 10, and his hard drive corrupted.
What do you call a hot Mac Book Pro?
A Mac Daddy Pro.
How is Stephen Hawking dead?
His Windows shit down.
I started a band called 999 megabytes... we still haven't gotten a gig.
A wife and husband were setting up their computer, and the husband made the password "my dick." But the wife fell on the floor laughing because the computer said the password was too short.
What's an alien's favorite computer key?
The space bar!
What does Stephen Hawking press after he's had a hard day?
F5
What is Bill Gates’ favorite equation?
1 + 1 =
Stephen Hawking's last words were, "Ethernet cable not detected, shutting down."
Where did Sally go during the bombing? Everywhere.
Your mama is so fat that when she was playing online, she crashed the whole server.
A blonde texts her husband on a cold winter’s morning: "Windows frozen, won't open."
Husband texts back: "Gently pour some lukewarm water over it and gently tap edges with hammer."
Wife texts back 5 minutes later: "Computer really messed up now."
Where do you take Stephen Hawking when he dies?
The Apple repair store.
Stephen Hawking only died because he tried to install Windows 10 and his hard drive corrupted
The only reason Stephen Hawking died is because he forgot to update to the latest version of Microsoft.
What does it say on Stephen Hawking's grave?
"Rust in peace."
