Comparison jokes
Yo forehead is bigger than the Great Wall of China!
What is the difference between an apple and an orphan?
The apple gets picked.
What's the difference between Michael Jackson and a plastic bag? One's made of plastic and dangerous for kids to play with, and the other carries groceries.
Your hair line is curved like a moving train.
I was gobsmacked when I encountered the Jacko special at a Bunnings sausage sizzle. A 40-year-old sausage on 7-year-old white bread.
What's the difference between an emo kid and a leaf? Only the leaf reaches the ground.
People are like potatoes.
We may look different, but we all taste the same with a little ketchup.
What's the difference between an ugly monster and you?
Nothing.
What do emo kids and Hitler have in common?
There's gonna be more brains on the wall when they lose something.
What's the difference between a hooker and a burrito?
I don't eat burritos.
Are you a camera? Because every time I look at you, I smile.
What's the difference between a McDonald's and the Twin Towers?
McDonald's has a drive-thru.
Roses are red,
Violets are blue.
God made me pretty, what happened to you?
What do girls and your hairline have in common? They are both receding.
Why are women like KFC? After you finish with the thigh and the breasts, all you have left is the greasy box to put your bone in.
Yo mama's teeth so yellow, I can't believe it's not butter!
The Twin Towers collapsed faster than my grandma did.
Obese is the N-word for fat people.
Roses are red, violets are blue, Shrek thought he was ugly until he saw you.
I thought the Sahara was the largest desert until I saw your forehead.