Classroom jokes
Teacher: "What is the opposite of the following sentence: 'Children in the dark make mistakes'?"
Student: "Mistakes in the dark make children."
The tables in my class are straight, but I can’t say the same thing for your hairline.
1, 2, I have a gun.
3, 4, I am in a school.
5, 6, Everyone on the ground!
(some kid crying because hes an orphan and kids are bulling him) teacher:HEY i was a orphan to so if you bully him your basicly trying to bully me too me:OOF teacher:now is somebody not here? me:your parents
I got in trouble at school today because I told the teacher at school with COVID to stay positive.
If a school shooter walks into a classroom and shoots an autistic kid, what does the kid say? "Why do I look like Swiss cheese?"
A boy in nursery asked a girl out. She ran away crying in fear, so he just went back to teaching.
School would be a lot different if the quiet kid had an RPG.
An orphan entered the high school for the first time. He has no knowledge of the school. He went to the secretary and asked where he shall go. The secretary then gave the orphan a schedule and said to the orphan, “Where is homeroom?” The secretary then asked which homeroom number he was assigned, and he said "1." The orphan then started to weep and said that his parents died right as he stole his first base in baseball.
What's the worst place to teach an orphan? Homeschool.
What do you get when you cross a vampire with a teacher?
Lots of blood tests!
Teacher on school bus, "Everybody sit down now, the bus is about to start."
Ben: "I’m not going to sit down. I don’t want to."
Teacher: "You have to, or else you have to get off the bus."
Teacher: "*stands up*"
Ben: "Then you should get off the bus 'cause you're not sitting."
What punishment are teachers unable to do to orphans?
Call their parents.
Teacher: What comes after C?
Me: Ooh! Ooh! C4!
Teacher: Umm, ok... but still what comes after A?
Me: AK47!!!
Teacher thought: Oh hell na.
Teacher: What comes after X?
Me: Xplosin.
1 second later, bomb goes off. Idk.
Teacher: Jeff, why did you throw a paper plane at the twins?
Jeff: You wouldn't get it, miss.
Quiet Kid: *reaches into bag*
Teacher: EVERYBODY RUN!
Teacher: Stand up if you think you are stupid.
After a while, a student stands up.
Teacher: So you think you are stupid?
Student: No, I'm not stupid. I just felt bad because you were standing by yourself.
The gay kid tried to shoot up the school, but his shots would not go straight.
Teacher: "What do you think is your purpose in our society?"
Me: "To reduce the population by one."
I got detention one day. I don’t know why; I only slapped the emo kid on the wrist.