Classroom jokes
What punishment are teachers unable to do to orphans?
Call their parents.
Teacher: What comes after C?
Me: Ooh! Ooh! C4!
Teacher: Umm, ok... but still what comes after A?
Me: AK47!!!
Teacher thought: Oh hell na.
Teacher: What comes after X?
Me: Xplosin.
1 second later, bomb goes off. Idk.
Teacher: Jeff, why did you throw a paper plane at the twins?
Jeff: You wouldn't get it, miss.
Quiet Kid: *reaches into bag*
Teacher: EVERYBODY RUN!
Teacher: Stand up if you think you are stupid.
After a while, a student stands up.
Teacher: So you think you are stupid?
Student: No, I'm not stupid. I just felt bad because you were standing by yourself.
The gay kid tried to shoot up the school, but his shots would not go straight.
Teacher: "What do you think is your purpose in our society?"
Me: "To reduce the population by one."
I got detention one day. I don’t know why; I only slapped the emo kid on the wrist.
Your forehead is so big that the teachers used it as a whiteboard.
My math teacher asked me what a liked term was. I told her I couldn't say, never experienced it.
I was struggling on a math test when a girl in a wheelchair leaned over and said, "Hey, this is the easiest thing I've done all day."
I was triggered, so the next day when we were doing the pledge, I leaned over and said, "This is the easiest thing I've done all day!"
Student: It's hot in here.
Teacher: That's because I'm in here.
What is everyone’s favorite class?
None, because people don’t like school.
What school subject does an orphan love?
PE because they actually get picked.
Is that my student?
Na! It is Jesus!
My teacher got so mad at me for making 9/11 jokes, she hit me twice and I said, "Damn, got hit twice!"
The teacher called Little Johnny to her desk. She said: “This essay you’ve written about your pet dog is exactly the same essay your brother has written.”
“Of course it is,” said Johnny. “It’s the same dog.”
Little Johnny was overheard by his mother reciting his homework, “Two plus two, the son of a b*tch is four; four plus four, the son of a b*tch is eight; eight plus eight, the son of a b*tch...;” “Johnny!” shouted his mother. “Stop swearing!” “But mom!” Little Johnny protested, “That’s what the teacher taught us! And she said we should recite it till we learned it!”
The next day his mother went to the teacher to complain. “No, no,” said the teacher, terrified. “That’s not what I taught them. They’re supposed to say: ‘Two plus two, the sum of which is four.’”
My teacher: If you could go anywhere, where would you go?
Me: Demon Slayer.
My teacher: Why?
The quiet kid: TO GET EATEN BY A DEMON OR BECOME ONE!!!
When the quiet kid gets angry and the sped kid sees your hiding spot.
Bing, bang, boom!