Class jokes

Have any of you guys heard the classic airplane jokes? Here's a good example...

A farmer, a doctor, and a terrorist are on a plane. An engine fails, and they are going to crash, so the pilot asks everyone to throw out some items. The farmer threw out his apple harvest, the doctor threw out medical supplies, and the terrorist, (not needing a bomb apparently) threw out his briefcase of bombs. They still crashed, and they started walking to the nearest town. They passed a boy who was running. "Why are you running?"

"My dad got hit by a shiny red object and now he's bleeding!"

They three of them decide it's best to keep quiet, and continue. They then passed a crying girl, who said that her brother had been killed by a scalpel from heaven. They said nothing and continued. Finally, they see a boy laughing so much he is in tears. They ask him, "What's so funny?"

"Grandma farted and the house blew up!"

The teacher says to do your homework. I do. My friends do. One person never does any of his homework.

Eventually, we had to have fun. He said he didn't do it. WOW what did he do? I like to think he got smacked and nearly committed suicide.

A kid walks into the classroom on time.

When you're mean to the quiet kid in your class and he kills everyone, good times.

Teacher: What do you want when you grow up?

That depressed kid in class: Dead.

You failed Helen Keller's speech class? It's okay, she's not a very good speaker.

In our history class we were on our China unit and learning a little about gunpowder.

And I said "WOAH THAT'S LIT!"

A disabled kid kept throwing up in class.

So I threw him out the window!

If a sped is late for class, is it wrong to call them tardy?

Your hairline is so far back that if you were a backbencher in class and I was a germ sitting on it, I would think that the rest of the backbenchers are seated in front of the class.

Why don't headless people have a head in class?

Because they know that they will be ahead of the class. XD

I was sitting in class when my teacher said, "Have any questions?" the suspended Class clown said, "Who's Joe?" So the teacher said, "Joe who?" So the clown said, "Joe Mama!" So I said, "What in the BALLS?" So I ended up staying in detention with the clown, ah, so cozy!

We were watching a 9/11 documentary in class and I said, "Man, they are really bad at Jenga!"

When you're watching a 9/11 documentary, that one kid in your class finds the 97th Jenga block and knocks it down.

Why do American guns only have 30 rounds?

Because it's the average class size.

Is it classed as down under if you eat out an Australian chick?

The smartest kid in my class says "is-land" instead of "island."

A friend sits across from me at class so I asked if she wants to hang out sometimes. She said yes, so I called her over to my house, and that's the day I found out she was a guy.

The moral of the story: don't try to fuck your friends.

Me: *opens a bag of hot Cheetos in class*

All my friends: Hey bro, can I have some?

People I don't know: Please lemme have some. PLEASE, I'll be your best friend!

People I say no to: (⊙-⊙)(⊙-⊙)(⊙-⊙)(⊙-⊙)(⊙-⊙)(⊙-⊙)

There is someone in my class named Henry Rocket Rueben, and he always says he rockets into my mom.