Teacher: What do you want when you grow up?
That depressed kid in class: Dead.
In our history class we were on our China unit and learning a little about gunpowder.
And I said "WOAH THAT'S LIT!"
Is it classed as down under if you eat out an Australian chick?
The smartest kid in my class says "is-land" instead of "island."
I was sitting in class when my teacher said, "Have any questions?" the suspended Class clown said, "Who's Joe?" So the teacher said, "Joe who?" So the clown said, "Joe Mama!" So I said, "What in the BALLS?" So I ended up staying in detention with the clown, ah, so cozy!
We were watching a 9/11 documentary in class and I said, "Man, they are really bad at Jenga!"
Why do American guns only have 30 rounds?
Because it's the average class size.
When you're watching a 9/11 documentary, that one kid in your class finds the 97th Jenga block and knocks it down.
A friend sits across from me at class so I asked if she wants to hang out sometimes. She said yes, so I called her over to my house, and that's the day I found out she was a guy.
The moral of the story: don't try to fuck your friends.
Me: *opens a bag of hot Cheetos in class*
All my friends: Hey bro, can I have some?
People I don't know: Please lemme have some. PLEASE, I'll be your best friend!
People I say no to: (⊙-⊙)(⊙-⊙)(⊙-⊙)(⊙-⊙)(⊙-⊙)(⊙-⊙)
An alligator is in a class, turns out he likes teaching!
There is someone in my class named Henry Rocket Rueben, and he always says he rockets into my mom.
Your hairline is so far back that if you were a backbencher in class and I was a germ sitting on it, I would think that the rest of the backbenchers are seated in front of the class.
If a sped is late for class, is it wrong to call them tardy?
Why don't headless people have a head in class?
Because they know that they will be ahead of the class. XD
My history teacher asked my class what time they would go back to just to see what happened.
I said I'd go back to Hitler's childhood to tell him the lies that he becomes the ruler of the world by starting the Nazis, and leave his death out of the discussion.
What do you say when Jack's late to sex ed?
"Aye-jack-you-late!"
You was reaching into you’re backpack and the whole class jumped through the window.
I see my friends at school. They talk to me, they go back to class, but they forgot I am their classmate, and they were like, "You're a dumbie." And I was, "Well, you're a dumbass, bi***!"
Why do women need a pay rise? Isn't the glass ceiling high enough?
