I tell orphan jokes like there ain’t no parents around
Mother: Who do you like more, me or your dad?
Liam: I like you both.
Mother: Ok, if I go to america and your dad goes to paris, where will you go?
Liam: I will go to paris.
Mother: That's means you like dad more.
Liam: No, its because i like paris.
Mother: Ok, fine, if I go to paris and your dad goes to america, where will you go?
Liam: I will go to America.
Mother: Why?
Liam: Because I have already gone to paris.
Chesley, in horror, runs out of the cockpit of the plane coming from London, "I'm so very sorry, everyone. I punched the wrong buttons, and we are heading to DC instead of New York, and we are about to run out of fuel." He opens the door and turns around to the five passengers and exclaimed, "I've parachutes but miscounted. We only got four for the passengers." He jumps off.
Donald faced the other four and orders:
"I'm the greatest leader of the world, and I'll make the decision. Tony, you go first. Our country needs you. The whole wide world needs you. Pandemic is raging."
Tony jumps off.
"Francis, my friend, you go next. Pandemic is ravaging the mind and body of millions. Their soul needs saving. Save Vladimir's and Xi's for me."
Francis jumps off.
Hillary faced Donald furiously. "Who are you to make decisions for us? I should have been president. I'm the smartest woman in the whole world in history."
Hillary jumps off.
Donald gazed at the young woman and started talking: "I'm an old man. I have already lived a full life - beautiful wives, children, just a beautiful life. Just beautiful. I've become president of the most powerful country, the most beautiful, the richest. Regrets? I've made a few but did it my way. Greta, go on. Your future is bright. I just wish I can make my country great again and have the chance to help save the world with you. I believe in second chances. Look at my bankruptcies, believe me. And I wish I've played more golf and..."
Greta interjected, "Just shut the f* up. The plane is about to crash. Let's go and save the world. The smartest woman in history took my backpack!"
What's your favorite place that orphans can't go to?
Home.
Person: Where's your mom and dad?
Orphan: :(
I was camping with my buddy, and there was a fire. We were roasting marshmallows, and there was a vine. I tripped on it and went penis first into the fire, and I said, "Well, there goes your children, stupid ass!"
Want to know why parents don't get school shooting jokes?
Because they are aimed at a younger audience.
why cant a orphans go on a field trip???
They need there parents permission😆😆😆😆😆😆
Children are so ungrateful nowadays. I got my daughter a bike, but now she’s crying on the floor saying, “I don’t have legs!”
The F in orphan stands for family... oh wait.
Why are orphanages like dogs?
Because they get adopted.
What's an orphan's favorite movie? Home Alone.
Why do my kids die?
Stinky Oussy :D
Why do orphans play tennis because that's the only thing they loved
How do orphans have a family reunion? They look in the mirror.
Sally's mother had four children. The fourth April, the second May, the third June. Who was the first child?
Sally.
when its April fools day go to a orphan and say there parents should come back
Why can orphans not grow big and strong? Because they need a parent to buy them steroids.
What’s long, yellow, and doesn’t float?
A school bus filled with children.
What song do orphans hate the most? "We are family."
