Childhood jokes
When you go to an orphanage for a field trip: When the workers said, "I remember you as a kid."
What did they do with his body when he died?
They made him into Lego so kids can play with him for once.
There's an upside to being an orphan; every snack they get is family size.
How do you help a depressed kid face their fears... You count to 3 and say jump?
Why are orphans so bad at baseball?
Most likely because they can't find home.
A cemetery should be built next to orphanages, so the orphans can see their parents.
What's the difference between apples and orphans?
Apples get picked.
What do you call a movie with kids with cancer? ... Finding Chemo.
I was watching my daughter play at the park. A woman came up to me and asked which one was mine. I said I was still choosing.
Little Johnny walked to his parents' room. They were having sex, and Little Johnny didn’t know what that was, so he said, "What are y’all doing?"
The parents replied, "Umm, r-rapping presents!"
Little Johnny said, "Okay," and then left. In the morning, Little Johnny opened his presents. His parents said, "This one is from Santa!"
Little Johnny said, "No, it’s not, y’all said y’all were rapping the presents."
The parents said, "Ohh fuck!"
Little Johnny replied, "What, Mommy and Daddy?" They replied, "Oh, nothing!" "Oh, okay," Little Johnny said. The mom whispered in the dad's ear, "At least he doesn’t know the truth."
Little Johnny said, "What truth?"
What flour do you give an orphan?
Self-raising.
Why are orphans bad at baseball?
They don't know where home is.
Why do orphans have water in their cereal?
Because their dad never came home with the milk.
Riddle me this. Riddle me that.
Why did my parents never come back?
Never say to an orphan, "Bye buddy, hope you find your dad!"
How do you make an orphan's hands bleed?
You tell him, "Clap your hands until your mom comes."
What's the difference between apples and orphans?
Apples get picked.
Why do orphans play baseball?
Because they have to run back to home base.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
They don't know where home is.
I saw an orphan fall in the street crying, so I ran up to him and said, "Are you okay? Where are your parents?"