Child jokes
Why can't an orphan play baseball?
Because they can't go home.
What's the difference between an orphan and an apple?
One's actually picked.
My wife and I have reached the decision that we do not want children.
If anyone does, please comment your contact details and we can drop them off tomorrow.
My girlfriend keeps calling me a pedophile. That’s a big word for a six-year-old.
Why are orphans not boomerangs? Because they never come back.
my son
Rape is no laughing matter. The reason why women are not believed in rape is because of you mother fucking shitbirds with no future who will become drunkards and drug dealers who go broke and live on the street getting hit by a fucking car. Fuck all of you sadists who think this kind of shit is funny, well shut the fuck up. Go jump off a bridge or get hit by car and I hope you fucking sickos die.
Stop rape. Stop rappe. Stop rapibg innocent children and women and men. I am done with rape. I am done with it!
How many babies does it take to paint a house? Depends on how hard you throw them.
How many children does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Not 27, because my basement is still dark.
What's the difference between a broken shovel and a young child?
The shovel doesn't cry when you swing it into a wall repeatedly.
What animal has 5 legs?
A pitbull on a children's playground.
Dark humor is like a kid with cancer.
It never gets old.
I saw an orphan in the grocery store and asked him, "Where's your mom?" and he cried. Why?
Did you know cannibals ate KFC?
Kentucky Fried Children.
Where does an orphan come from?
Daddy getting milk.
What’s the difference between an apple and an orphan?
The apple gets picked.
Q: Why can't orphans be gay?
A: They have nobody to call daddy.
What’s the difference between orphans and blind children?
None. Neither can see their parents.
How many babies does it take to paint a wall red? Depends, how hard can you throw them?
What is cold and alone?
An orphan's parent.
Why don't Chinese children believe in Santa?
Because they're the ones making the toys.