Case jokes

Yo mama so fat, she has to use pillowcases for socks.

Why do fathers take an extra pair of socks when they go golfing?

In case they get a hole in one!

What does a lawyer defending a killer and a password have in common? They're case sensitive.

I guess age is just a number, but in your boyfriend's case, a personal preference.

Three women—a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead—are riding through the desert on a dune buggy. About two hours later, their vehicle dies with no gas, and they're forced to travel to their destination on foot, but they all agree to carry something with them.

The brunette brings canteens of water.

The redhead takes a large beach umbrella.

The blonde somehow rips off the car door.

The redhead asks her, "Why did you take the whole car door?"

To which the blonde replied, "So I can roll down the window in case it gets too hot."

Did you hear about the guy who was arrested for stealing luggage? Unfortunately, he lost his case.

Dwayne “the Rock” Johnson has made a laudable, command decision to omit real firearms from his movie sets.

This being the case, he ought to produce, direct, and star in his next movie titled: “The Rubber Gun Squad!” 👌 😉

Hi, I'm Saul Goodman. Did you know that you have rights? The Constitution says you do, and so do I. I believe that until proven guilty, every man, woman, and child in this country is innocent, and that's why I fight for you, Albuquerque!

Have you heard about the corduroy pillow cases? They've been making headlines.

When you met her first before your parents met each other. (In the case of your mom dating her dad).

In case there's a school shooting, the teachers can help out and shoot the kids.

Your hairline is so far back it became a case.

Why should you always knock on the fridge door before opening it? In case there's a salad dressing.

Yo yo Zac, have you Amber HEARD about the Johnny Depp case? ARRRRRRRRRRR!

What does this website with its comments and a cult have in common?

We have a case of Witzelsucht.

I lost my job making storage units for the police after a week. I guess you could say it was a brief case.

So... here's da scoop, alright... *licks KFC off lips* so, I was caught having sex wit three 6 year olds (girls btw, just in case you guys get mad) and da judge told me I was getting da death penalty, you know what I mean?

I had a last resort to save myself though, you feel me? So I told da judge, I said to him, I said: "Yo honah, 6 + 6 + 6 = 18, you smell me?"

Needless to say, I was announced a fre-e-e-e-e-e-e man after dat, you feel me?

But then, the Predator Poachers nigckas just barged into the courtroom and they said: 4 + 4 + 5 = 13!

Alas, I'm writing this joke from jail, and judging by the look my prisonmate Tyrone is giving me, I'll be writing jokes from hell from now on.

Why do golfers bring an extra pair of socks? In case they get a hole in one.

Why don't orphans play baseball?

Because they can't run home.

Man, I’m so sorry that Stephen Hawking is dead; he was such a good person.

Too bad it’s a staircase to Heaven and not a ramp.