Car jokes
Why can't orphans play baseball? They don’t know where home is.
I made a website for orphans, but it doesn't have a home page.
Doctor: I’m going to have to turn you away. Orphan: But why? Doctor: Because I’m a family doctor.
Why do orphans like boomerangs? Cause they come back.
Why do orphans become criminals? To know what it’s like to be wanted.
Girls are like rocks; the flat ones get skipped.
What’s an orphan’s least favorite TV show? Family Guy.
If you hit an orphan, what are they going to do? Tell their parents?
If you hit an orphan with a car, at least you don't have to tell their parents.
Why did the orphan go to church? So he had someone to call Father.
What does an orphan call a family photo? A selfie.
Why was the orphan a big success? Cause people say go big or go home, he only had one option.
Why is it ok to hit an orphan? It’s not like they can tell their parents.
What’s an orphan’s least favorite store? Home Depot.
What do orphans and blind kids have in common? They can’t see their parents.
Why can't orphans hear about ancient Egypt? Because they don’t know what a mummy is.
Why are orphans bad at poker? Because they don't know what a full house is.
What do you call a virgin from Alabama? An orphan.
What is a pirate's favorite ride? A carrr!
"How was your day?"
"It was great."
"What was so great about it?"
"I saw a puppy."
"Awww."
"And I ran over it :)"
When you run over a speed bump in a school zone and you remember that there are no speed bumps.
Your hairline reminds me of a car taking a U-turn.
Racecar backwards is racecar, but racecar sideways is how Paul Walker died.
Why is Paul Walker a walker?
To let people know he isn't a driver.
What's the difference between parking a car and finding a girlfriend?
All the good ones are taken, so you stick it in the disabled one and hope nobody finds out.
What does Johnny Depp hate about driving a car?
He can't drink and drive.
Decent sausages, average price, good car and seats... nothing.
Did you know Paul Walker had dandruff? Neither did I til I seen his Head and Shoulders on the dashboard.
How did they know that Princess Diana had dandruff?
They found her head and shoulders in the glove compartment...
Why did the car drive over the cake?
'Cause it was in tiers!! Lol, sorry this ain't funny.
I hate when people leave their cars running, especially in the summer.
I'm like, "You got Tracy Latimer in there or something?"
What do you call a race car driver with Down syndrome? Down shift.
I did a walk, walk, and I had to a car and a walk home from home I did.
What is the difference between a human being in the car with the snow and a tree and a walk walk home and walk walk home from school and walk walk home 🏠 was your name on it haha 😂 day a day I was thinking of a good
What's the difference between a spare tire and dead hookers? I don't have 8 spare tires in my trunk.
What's black and white and red all over? The prisoner I just hit with my car.
Q: What do you call a pigeon that is full of poop that flies in front of a car?
A: A suicide bomber.