Canning Jokes

What are two plus sides to being an orphan?

1. All your snacks are family sized.

2. No one can make jokes about your mama.

I have a better method of abortion than currently used. It's like a regular one, except you can get free food out of it... We're about to give baby-back ribs a whole new meaning.

My homework was to watch as much porn as I can... and tell my teacher the details so he won't get in trouble for watching it during class.

The guy in the wheelchair at my gym can do so many pull-ups with the wheelchair on, but I said to him, "Don't skip leg day."