Cannibal jokes
A missionary was caught by cannibals. He was tied up and thrown into a big pot. The cannibals were chopping up vegetables and throwing them into the pot with the missionary. When they lit the fire under the pot, the missionary said, "You can't stew me. I'm a friar."
Why do cannibals not like to eat clowns?
Cause they taste funny!
What’s a cannibal's favorite food? Ramen (Ra-Men).
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Stranger.
Stranger who?
Stranger, why are you in my house masticating my apparent dead wife?
Bro, wait, are cannibals real, though?
Anyway, my joke is if you eat yourself, are you a cannibal?
Think about it, lol. Haha.
Three guys are stranded with cannibals on an island. The cannibals said, "Each one of you come back with 10 pieces of fruit and shove them up your butt showing no emotion." The first guy came back with 10 apples, and by the second one, he started to grunt, so he was killed and eaten.
The second one came back with cherries, and when he went to put the 10th one in, he started to laugh, so he was killed and eaten. The two guys met in heaven, and the first guy said, "Dude, you were so close. What happened?" The second one said, "I would have made it, but I saw the third guy come back with 10 pineapples!!" 😝😝🤣🤣
What do you call a baby kangaroo? Joey.
What do you call a 6 year old named Joey? Supper.
Roses are blood red, violets are twilight-hued; your blood was delectable, and so was the rest of you.
What does the cannibal get after a one night stand?
Breakfast in bed!
Your mom is so stupid, she thought eating ass was cannibalism.
These two cannibals are sitting by the campfire having dinner. One says, "I can't stand my mother-in-law." The other says, "So, just eat the potatoes."
These cannibal kids come running into the cave and ask their mom what's for dinner? She says, "Dad's gonna grill wieners!"
I have ligma.
Question: Why don't cannibals eat clowns?
Answer: Because they taste funny!
Three men are shipwrecked on a jungle island and taken prisoner by the residing cannibals. They are all told to walk into the jungle and come back with one piece of fruit. They go in and the first man comes out with a peach. He is instructed to shove it in his ass, and if he laughs, he will be killed. He tries and dies.
The second man comes back with a grape and is instructed to do the same. When the two meet at the pearly gates, the first man says, "I had a peach. They're fuzzy. You had a grape. What's your excuse?"
"Well, I was doing fine until I saw Jimmy come out of the brush with a pineapple."
There was a cannibal who had a wife and eight kids.
When the cannibal was late for dinner, he got the cold shoulder.
What did the cannibal get when he showed up to the party late?
A cold shoulder.
Will: Let's bring Hannibal a gift today!
Beverly: Yeah, I bet he’d love that!
Will: Yey!
Beverly: What should we bring him?
Will: *holds up a bucket and knife with an insane looking smile* Come in the bucket!
what do you call a baby in an oven?
my next meal.